What does a blond see when she looks at a dog? A four legged mammal, refered to as canis lupus familiaris, or what is commonly known as a dog.

What's worse than having amnesia? I don't remember.

Q) Whats wet fishy and gets caught by fishermen? A) fish.

If push pops give life a push, Then isn't your mailbox purple?

whos gay rusty kohlen hit him up on facebook!

watashi no namae wa ramune desu

A man walks into a bar. It was a metal bar. He cracked his skull and died in the hospital shorty afterward.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m-BD0nWgoIw

What did Jesus say last before being nailed to the cross? I don't know, It never happened. ...Why did he say that? He didn't, it's not real.

Tom buys his wife Mary the latest Eco friendly car. The car is said to get well over 100 miles on a tank of gas. A week later, Tom is stunned to learn that while Mary was driving to the supermarket the car ran out of gas. The tank was full and Mary only drove 5 miles. How is this possible? Mary was involved in a horrible car accident. The gas tank immediately emptied and set fire to Mary and her baby.

Q: How many flies does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Well considering the weight of a fly is 1.2 grams, and the weight of a light bulb is 50 grams (and this is assuming that the fly can lift its own body weight) it would take 41.6 flies. But also considering the fact, that the .6th of a fly is impossible, because it is more than likely to be deceased, it is impossible for flies to screw in a light bulb.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Just kidding, it got hit by a car on the way to the other side.

What's black and white and red all over? A mime that got hit by a train

1. A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: ''Ugh, that's the ugliest baby I've ever seen!'' The woman walks to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her: ''The driver just insulted me!'' The man says: ''You go up there and tell him off. Go on, I'll hold your monkey for you.''

If a tree falls in the woods and no one is around to hear it does it make a sound? I don't know... Does the deaf woman locked in my basement?

Why did the blonde walk into the wall? I lied it was nathaniel nugnes

What do you get when you cross The Incredible Hulk and King Kong? Two angry fictional characters.

How did the Jew his German neighbor? Every morning the Jew says hello and the German replys hello

How do you know a thief has been using your computer? It's missing.

She is so fast We call her Email Instead of Emily...

Why did the boy fall off the swing? He didnt.

A man walks into a bar Then another man shoots him in the head because he has anger issues.

Roses are Violets, Violets are Roses, I am a dumb ass, The Hobbit.

What's big and white and will kill you if it falls from a tree? Your mom.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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