Why do babies cry on airplanes? Because gay people are getting married.

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What's Mary short for? She's got no legs.

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A man walks through a doorway but there was a door there so he got injured

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Life is an elephant, get married.

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Who is so stupid they could literally be classified as mentally retarded? Evan Lovro

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What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence? Time to call animal control.

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Tic tac toe. You were adopted.

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An asian, mexican, and a black guy walk into a bar, and the bartender says, "get the hell out"

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Knock Knock Who's there? St. Judes St.Judes who ? St.Judes Research Hospital calling. Give me money, I've got cancer kids dying

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Question: What is black and white and read all over? Guess: A newspaper? Answer: No. A zebra that was shot by a poacher. Poaching is a serious problem all over the world and should be looked down upon by all. It is not something to joke about.

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Knock knock Who's there? No Who is over there

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations]) That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

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Two Blondes walk into a bar. They each enjoy a refreshing drink before heading home to greet their family

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What clicks when its out of lead ? A gun Why was the little black boy crying ? He ran out of that grape drank How do you make a dead baby float ? You take your foot of its head How do you know when your life is over ? When you start watching Twilight What is blue and sticky ? Blue Stick What do you get when you mix a dog and a cat ? Shit

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i shouldnt be on this cause im in class

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Friends are like bananas. If you peel their skin and eat them they die.

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What would you do for a klondike bar? I'm allergic to milk.

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What kind of sex do you have with twenty seven year olds any kind you want there are twenty of them

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If Jimmy has 60 candy bars and eats 50 of them, what does he have? Diabetes.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a registered sex afender

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Q: What do you call a black hitchhiker? A: A hitchhiker

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Once upon a time, there was this guy. He lived a good life and then died.

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What is not a crocodile? The teenage mutant ninja turtles

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What did the teacher say to the student? Get in the closet

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops