A. Knock Knock B. Welcome!

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What is brown and sticky? A stick.

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What is Megan Fox's middle name? Denise

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Whats the difference between a raisin and a old lady? One is alive, i think.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

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Yo mamma's so fat, at her last annual checkup her attending physician informed her that if she did not attempt to control her weight gain through a careful moderation of her diet and began exercising on a regular basis, that her obesity would soon manifest itself in a variety of chronic health conditions that would permanently alter her ability to enjoy life and could significantly decrease her lifespan.

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Knock knock. "Who's there?" I am deaf. "I am deaf who?" What?

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If she is under the age of 18 years old and is identified by your state as a minor, shes too young for you bro.

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whats better then 10 babies nailed to 1 tree... 1 baby nailed to 10 trees!

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why cant helen keller drive? because cars werent popularly accepted when she lived.

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what is worst than finding a worm in your apple? finding half a worm in your apple

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did a second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first monkey. Why did a third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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"Knock, Knock" "who's there" "John doe" "John doe who" "I told you my my name was john doe"

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Good to know tattletale, I remember hating you back then when you betrayed me, but I cant wait to meet you again. Anyway Nero, I am a girl, its not about sex with me, I just had to tell you, and hope you will take better care of yourself, I know you used to be worried about your looks, and I just want you to understand ill be there for you no matter what. Thanks for the kind words Nero, I know you mean them, you never hid the fact that you found me attractive, but while I did not understand then why you would ruin every nice moment by saying something cheesy or rude, I think I get it now... I know you need rest, but can I arrive as soon as possible? Ill just wait outside or something, I wont be a bother I promise.

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Whats the difference between a blonde and a brunette? One is blonde and one is brunette.

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why did the chicken cross the road because the farm is across the street from were it is now

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What did grandma receive for her 75th birthday? Alzheimer's.

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What do you call a person at your door? Whatever his name happens to be.

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You're Adopted.

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say this really fast D I C K, C H I C K, C H I C K, D I C K, D I C K, C H I C K, C H I C K, D I C K, D I C K, C H I C K, D I C K, C H I C K, C H I CK, D I C K IF YOU CANT LIKE IT

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What did the dog say to the cat? "Bark."

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You are so average that, if you entered an average contest, you'd come in middle place.

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fack me in the ace! CC

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How much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? 17

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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