Your mother called last night. She wants her recipe back.

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What does it smell like, what does it feel like, do you like it? Yes

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Knock knock Who's there? Not you

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What's green , has 4 legs and if it fell out of tree on you , would hurt you ? A Pool table

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Whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? You eat a pizza.

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Your mother is so fat that she is highly likely to get heart disease and/or diabetes.

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A priest and a rabbi are walking down the street when they see an orphanage on fire. "Oh my god!" says the rabbi. "We have to save the children!" "Screw the children!" says the priest. "Out of what?" replies the rabbi.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It had the utmost desire to.

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Why can't the blonde dial 911? Because she's being held hostage against her will.

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What did the boy do when he got an F on his English paper? -Laughed.

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Q:whats comes back to life and says RAR A;jesus

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There are 100 men enjoying a cruise to celebrate an important contract going through at their place of employment. The boat then suffers a major malfunction and tragically sinks to the bottom of the ocean, miles from any land masses. Not a single man died, how is this possible? They all used the lifeboats supplied on the boat and followed the standard procedure to deal with such a crisis.

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I may have alzheimers...Thank god I dont have alzheimers

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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m-BD0nWgoIw

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A blonde girl walks into the local dry cleaners. She places a garment on the counter. "I'll be back tomorrow afternoon to pick up my dress." she says. "Come again?" says the clerk, cupping his ear. "I said 'I'LL BE BACK TOMORROW AFTERNOON TO PICK UP MY DRESS'," says the girl, this time louder.

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Why did samantha die? Because she had cancer.

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Why did ned fall out of the tree? Because he was hit by a koala.

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What did the black man say when he ate a Hershey bar? Delicious

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Lol! Why you wanna know?

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What do you call a pen sitting on a counter? A righting utensil not being currently used.

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Why did was micheal jackson named micheal jackson? because his was

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Why are black people so good at basketball? Hard work and dedication.

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Why couldn't the basketball player jump anymore? Because he broke his back.

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What do you call a puppy with no limbs? It doesn't matter, he's never coming back.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops