Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms

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How many Jews can you fit in a Volkswagen Bug? Four, maybe 3, depending on the size of each person.

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Yo' Mama's so old that her age is over the average age of most people.

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Why did the blind man cross the road? To end the suffering of a lifetime illness.

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What do you call 5 of my friends and 5 of your friends hanging out together? I don't know. I don't have any friends.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his cow? Where's my wife?

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Who did the Vampire bite? No one because vampires aren't real.

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What's better than four dead babies in one trashcan? Nothing. Those babies could have grown up to be new heads of state or even the doctor who discovers the cure for cancer.

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I win an iPad for pooping on someone's head Answer- We have a muddaf**kin winna

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What is red and doesnt exist? No-tomato.

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What's funnier than 24? 25

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What is big, white and hairy A refrigerator, I lied about the hair

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Q. How much wood can a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? A. Actually woodchucks can't chuck wood only beavers can

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What is worse than the holocaust? 2 holocausts

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Why did the dog kill the fish? He had no reason, he just wanted fish. What, you thought he had like, a vendetta? pssh your crazy

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What do you get when you cross an intersection? Possibly a lower leg contussion, ACL tear, breaks in 4 different sections of your arm and lots of brain swelling if you are hit by a car.

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What did America get on the 11th September? 9/11

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A horse walked into a bar and the bartender asked, "Why the long face?" The horse then replied, "Well my wife is dying of cancer, my mother is a drug addict, and my two kids are in the hospital for 3rd degree burns."

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What's a worse feeling than an upset stomach? Seeing a child getting molested and not saying anything.

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Yesterday, I was hosting a party, and there were a lot of people crowding around some fruit punch I made all trying to get a glass... Whoops, it appears I forgot the Punch line.

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What's brown and sticky? A stick.

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ring ring young man: dad? mom's dead? woman: i think you dialed the wrong number young man: .......oh im sorry, you're absolutely right, silly me! woman: don't worry about it. young man: (chuckles) click

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knock knock

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What did the gay man do last night? Had a curry

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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