An Englishman, Irishman, and Jew walk into a bar. Steven Spielberg is a Jew.

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Did you know that if you stacked enough elephants to reach from the earth to the moon, all those elephants would die?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the road was clear of oncoming traffic.

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Worst joke ever

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How many Neurons does a bug have? - - - - - -- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -- - - - - - -- - - - -- - - - - - -It's true

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The class valedictorian is about to give his speech to the class. He has 6 fingers total, he is missing an ear, his left nostril is burned shut, and he must walk on crutches because of the severe injury to his left knee. How does the extremely cruel Principal of the school introduce him? "Please welcome Gregory Barnes, a brave soul that conquered a battle against death itself an won".

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A young blind boy is being tucked into bed by his mother. The mom says "Now Billy, pray really hard tonight and tomorrow, your wish will come true!". Billy says, "Ok mommy." and goes to sleep. The next morning, Billy wakes up and screams "MOMMY! I'm still blind, my wish didn't come true!", the mom answered, "I know - April Fools!"

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Q: What did the blonde woman say? A: My hair is blonde

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Hey i just met you and this is crazy, but heres my penis, so suck it baby.

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Chuck Norris doesn't shave.

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What's the difference between a black guy and a piece of chicken? They were once both alive and innocent. I lied about the black guy.

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What do you call a man with no arms and legs in the ocean? Dead.

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Want to hear a good joke? The NBA.

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What happened to the village that got swept by a tsunami? It was destroyed.

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Justin Bieber's Never Say Never 3D came out the other day. I went to see it, and it was a pretty good movie.

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Yo momma's so fat, that she was put in this joke

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What did the pedefile say to the child? Get in the van

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Q: What did one car say to another? A: Nothing. Cars can't speak.

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What' do you call a fart in a box? Your mom's puzsy

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Why did Janie miss school today? Because she fell in a well.

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Why did Sally drop her ice cream? Because she got hit by a bus.

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What do you call a kid with cancer? screwed

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Men's Sports

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What do you get wen u cross a cat and a walrus? Two animals with very different life styles.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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