Q: whats worse than a Muslim? A: a Jew

How many surrealists does it take to screw in a light bulb? Yarn

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because Armando masturbated

What's the difference between a tomato and a rhinoceros? Neither of them can ride a bicycle.

What do you call Eric Torres A furnace magnet

what has 2 eyes but can't see... an asian

knock knock whos there the game _______I LOST THE GAME_______

Q: Why did Sally fall off the swing? A: She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

What do you call a Mexican on a boat? A sailor

knock! knock! whos there? doctor doctor who? no Doctor Brown, you have cancer

Q: Why did the girl fall off the swing? R: Because she had no arms.

What do you call a comedian who can;t make people laugh? A bad comedian.

Why didn't the woman believe in God? Her own personal beliefs.

why'd the baby cross the road it was stapled to the chicken

Did you hear about the black guy who got into college? Actually, there are nearly 10,00 African Americans who get accepted into college every year. This specific black male is notable because of his stellar grades and his activity in his community.

Why was the first name of the boy 'Price'? His parents were Hamsters.

What happened when the man rubbed the magical lamp? Nothing.

Not an anti-joke, but an anti-pick-up-line: How much does a polar bear weight? Not as much as you!

What's green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the the wheels.

Why was Sally crying She got a high five In the face With a chair

How do you get a blonde to break a nail? Smash her finger with a wrench.

How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? Well, if the socket were 20 feet in the air, it might take 4 blondes with really good balance. Then again, it might not matter how many blondes there are due to transportation issues. (What if there are no replacement light bulbs in the house, and the nearest store was 10 miles away? It would be ridiculous to expect someone to walk twenty miles to replace a light bulb) In conclusion, I would say that the number of blondes it takes to screw in a light bulb is dependent on the individual situation at hand.

What doesn't kill you makes you stronger. Unless you're paralyzed.

Once upon a cross

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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