so dont touch it.

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why was the black woman forced to sit in the back of the bus? all the other seats were taken.

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A Mime travels to Africa for a vacation. He meets a Zebra in his travels and the Zebra says "Hey we both are wearing black and white stripes!" The Mime did not understand the Zebra because he cannot talk his language so he continues on with his vacation.

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A duck sits down at a bar and orders a drink. After he finishes, he gets up to leave, when the bartender says, "Excuse me, sir, but you didn't pay for your drink." The duck turned around and said, "I'm sorry, I forgot." So he paid the bartender for the drink and left him a nice tip, and left the bar in a good mood.

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Whats fuzzy and greenand if it falls from a tree it will kill you? A pool table.

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Q: what animal didnt get on Noah's ark in pairs? A: worms. they got on in apples.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing set? Because she had a seizure.

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How do you get 100 Jews into a car? ...Nevermind, it wouldn't work.

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Q: What did the alcoholic get for his Birthday?\ A: A Jail Sentence

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Why could'nt the boy eat peanuts? Because if he did he would proceed to have an allergic reaction, his throat would swell up, he would go into analeptic shock and die.

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What is red and itchy? Something that itches and it turns red if you itch it to much

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why do all good things come to an end? that is one of the mysteries of human existance.

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When life gives you lemons make lemonade, when life gives you apples make apple juice, when life gives you cranberries make cranberrie juice and then when live gives you mangos, Eat them :)

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What's the difference between a cow and a fat person. Nothing

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Pen. Pen who? Pen is blue.

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what's brown and sticky? A stick

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An asian is driving a car. He observes the speed limit and uses his turning signals while switching lanes.

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if u like this i wont pay you a dollar

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Why do blondes where pigtails? Because they look nice.

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so a mom is like so what you want hunny and the dad goes like you baby bahahahahaa get it?

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Do you believe this will change?

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Whats black and crying after 10 minute my wife's eyes when she left the kitchen

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Your birth certificate is an apology letter from the condom factory.

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Did you hear about the new pirate movie? It was rated PG-13.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops