2 tomatoes walk across a road tomato 1 gets hit by a car tomato 2 gets confused, because tomatoes don't have legs and therefore cannot "walk across a road" And furthermore, a tomato does not have a brain, and thus cannot get confused.

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What is white and stands in the corner? A refridgerator who has been very bad...

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To go to the slaughter-house.

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Waseem is sad because all his jokes are not funny!

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what's worse than a dead baby in the bathtub? if the baby was named Grace.

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Four rats are smoking in an alley. One rat turns to another and comments, "These are some fine smokes. Where'd ya score these?" The rat holding the pack of Menthols replies, "Off a' Fred." He points to a rotting whale carcass in the road. The other rats are horrified. "How did a whale die in the street?!," they squeak. "He didn't. He died on the beach."

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Where did Lil' Suzie go after the explosion? Everywhere.

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Why did the black kid fail his math test? Because he had down syndrome

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Knock knock. Whos there? The police, your wife is dead. The police, your wife is dead who? Sir, this isn't a joke.

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hipsters

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What do you call a baby with no future? A baby dying at birth.

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A little boy and a pedafile are walking through the forest at night. The little boy says "I'm scared." The pedafile says "You're scared? I have to walk home alone."

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Your maternal figure contains so many Triglycerides, her belt size is greater than or equal to the circumference of the Earth.

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What did little jimmy get for Christmas? A box containing the malevolent soul of a 10,000 year-old demon determined to torment his cat.

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One day my dog ran away. We drove around for a long time looking for it.

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what did the lawyer say to the doctor? hello.

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Two robots walk into a bar, just kidding, they have Polio.

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What do you call a black midget with no legs and has 11 fingers? A human being

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Where's Waldo? Nowhere. Waldo is a fictional character. He doesn't exist.

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How many dead babies can you fit in a bath tub? 27

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Why wasn't the black guy allowed into the bar? Because the bar was closed.

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how many jews can you fit in a volkenswagen? 2 jews in the front 2 jews in the back 15 jews in the ashtray

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meme

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roses are red, violets are violet.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops