Nicole Ritchie walks into a grocery store.

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The man goes to the doctor after just losing his job because his company went under because of the econmic crisis. His house is being foreclosed because without the money from his job he can't afford to pay for his house. His girlfriend also just left him because of recent conflicts about money and she was looking forward to having a family and with him jobless it was just out of the question. Man:"Doctor I could really use some good news" Doctor:"You have aids"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The bold and unpredictable female bird escaped under the horror of the fearful fence of which enclosed the innocent chickens. As she wandered towards the nearby city of magic and dreams she approached by a large, empty road. A mysterious, shining object in the distant caught her eye. As she slowly to a shivering step towards the intereging sparkle, she was ran over by a car. EPIC FAIL LOL!!!!

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Two muffins are baking in an oven. The muffins do not talk or move, because they not living.

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What did the rat say to the snake when it ate it. Nothing for the rat is a rat and there for can not communicate through talk to the snake nor could it survive as the snake's digestive system disintegrated it in a matter of minutes.

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Q - What do you call a hamburger without pickles? A - You call it a hamburger just without the pickles.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is blind and death, making her oblivious of her surroundings and would be a danger to fellow commuters. -mac

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What's a worse feeling than an upset stomach? Seeing a child getting molested and not saying anything.

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Q.What do you call a apple with a unibrow? A. A failed science experiment!!!

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? He didn't want to.

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....ZZzzzzz.....ZZzzzzz.....

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Knock Knock. Who's there. To. To who. To whom.

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THE GAME

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Why couldn't the asian man drive? He had no arms.

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Whats brown and smells like poo?? Poo

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Why did the man climb to top of the tower? To push the Jew off.

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Why is Steven so gay? Because hes actually Richard Simmons

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Whats black and white and red all over? A multicultural parade where they all are wearing red clothes.

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Q: What's long and brown? A: The unemployment line.

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Q: what is long hard and full of seamen A: a submarine

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Johnny got hit by a bomb. Where is he now? Everywhere. Knock knock. (Who's there?) Not Johnny

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because it was DEAD!

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Roses are red Violets are blue I suck at rhyming Refrigerator.

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Why did the lizard cross the road? Because he was stapled to the chicken.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops