Q: Why don't Jewish cannibals like Germans A: Because it gives them gas

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Why did the guy with alzheimer's say to his wife? He can't remember.

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What did the 5 cent store clerk say to the customer? That will be 5 cents.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it noticed that there may be foodstuffs on other side.

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An Englishman, and Irishman, and a Scottsman walk into a bar and the bartender says, "Is this some kind of a joke?"

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A priest and a prostitute are sitting next to each other on a bus. The priest asks her what she does, and she says "I sell my body to strange men." The priest then explains to her about Christianity, and she gives up her ways and becomes a devout Christian.

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How long did it take azaha to have a shit? Nine months

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Why are children like books? They are highly flammable if covered in gasoline.

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John - hey do you have tickets to see Oasis? Sam - No I bought green day tickets intead John then proceeds to violently masturbate. Sam at first feels uncomfortable, then shits all over John and joins in.

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Why was the kindergarten teacher crying? a child had just choked to death

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Why did the cat fall out of the tree? Cause the branch broke. Why did the baby fall out of the tree? Cause it was stapled to the cat.

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What do you get when you cross sodium citrate, citric acid, benzyl alcohol, monoethanolamine, sodium benzoate, gylcol disterate, FD&C Yellow #5, ammonium lauryl sulfate, methylisothiazolinone, fragrances/perfumes, FD&C Blue #1, sodium chloride, zinc pyrithione, methylchloroisothiazolinone, ammonium xylenesulfonate, ammonium laureth sulfate, cetyl alcohol, cocamide, guar hydropropyltrimonium chloride, 1-Decene, homopolymer, hydrogenated, trimethylolpropane tricaprylate and water? Head & Shoulders Dandruff Shampoo for Fine-Oily Hair

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why did sally fall off the swing? because she had no arms. knock knock? who's there? not sally.

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James: They say attitudes are contagious. Bill: How do you know? James: My whole family caught it and they will all die within 2 weeks.

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If life gives you lemons ask where they came from.

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What do 9 out of 10 people enjoy? gang rape

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Wy did the chicken?

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What did the officer say to the black man? You're under arrest.

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A midget walks into a bar. No one cares.

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Me: Ask me if im a penguin friend: are you a penguin? me: no.

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Two men walk into a bar... ..I didn't say what type of bar...

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Why did the student fail his test? Because he has AIDS

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Why did the boy want to commit suicide? Because he didn't want to die.

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whats worse than finding out you have Alzheimer's? Finding out you have Alzheimer's

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops