Roses are red, But ravens are black, please go to China, and never come back!

Person 1 : i need to sneeze Person 2 : ok ( person 1 sneezes ) Person 2 : bless u ( few seconds later ) did u sneeze? Person 1 : yep :)

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? because she was SHITFACED!!!!

four little monkeys jumping on the bed... one fell of and bumped his head... mama called the doctor and the doctor said... im calling child protection services.

A blind man walks into a bar. And a table. And a chair.

If pro is the opposite of con, then what is the opposite of progress? Digress

What did the Vietnam veteran see on Christmas that changed his life? Nothing, he was blind. He continued to live his life in the same way, begging for drug money and getting bullied by all the other homeless vets.

A man walks into a bar and sees a large jar filled to the brim with $20 bills. He asks the bartender why there is so much money in the jar, and the bartender tells him that he has a horse in the back of the building, and he has a bet that if someone puts $20 in the jar and can make the horse laugh, then they will win all the money. The man, feeling confident, puts his money into the jar and tries to make the horse laugh. It is a horse, so of course he cannot make it laugh. He leaves, dejectedly, having just wasted 20 of his hard earned dollers.

How did the family of Cubans get to Florida? They flew first class from their home in upstate New York.

Three bars walk into a Jew.

What starts with a P and ends with a O-R-N? Popcorn

Knock, Knock! Cum inside ;;)

Why didn't the restaurant serve the black man? He hadn't ordered anything.

Q:what do you call a black man flying a plane? A: a pilot

What's invisible and smells like a carrot? A rabbit's fart.

how do you kill a blonde? shoot her in the face with a pistol

How did Hitler fit 100 Jews in his car? Ashes don't take up much space.

sticks and stones may break my bones but hemophilia will make me bleed to death

What did the 10 year old luekemia patient get for christmas? Dead parents

please dis this joke, I want to get to the bottom of the leaderboard!

Whats gayer than driving a prius Buttsex

A Jewish man died in a car crash. His family mourned his death throughout the next few years.

Samantha

hey bill!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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