A man was driving five penguins across the Croatian-Serbian border. He was a penguin smuggler.

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roses are gray violets are gray everything's gray I'm a #$%ing dog

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What did God say to Noah? "Hi."

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How many Jews can you fit in a Volkswagon? 2 in the front seat, 3 in the back.... and that's it because the holocaust never happened.

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Q. Why did the middle-aged man need glasses? A. The man's father had poor eyesight and therefore could not see well without the help of glasses.

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Why did the boy have cable? I don't know.

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What did the young boy get His dad for fathers day? Nothing, his dad died from a very aggresive cancer

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Nock Nock It's open.

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why did the disabled man go to the shops? because he wanted a radiator panel

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What's green and has wheels? A green car.

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whats the difference between a pizza and a Jew?... Nevermind, that was a stupid question.

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Why didn't the blonde make it in a gun circle? The blonde yelled "Fire"

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What's funnier than the world ending? Ray Charles and Stevie Wonder in a staring contest.

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Comedy.

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What did the cat say to the dog? Nofin Eejit.

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Whats long, hard, and has cum in it? Cucumber

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I'm wet Ew you perv.. Stop thinking like that ! I just took a shower.

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if Ruddell was gay what would he be? A gay prick!

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Q:What did the furry say to the other? A: Probably nothing, cant be easy speaking with a dick in your mouth...

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A brown haired girl and a blonde girl are driving through a cornfield. Because of this illegal activity, they are sent to court and given 8 years in the state prison.

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If a tree falls on a cat in the woods, does it make a sound? Yes and no, the tree falling makes a loud noise, but the cat under it is instantly killed, preventing any sound that would of been made by the now crushed feline.

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This is a little story about four people named Everybody, Somebody, Anybody, and Nobody. There was an important job to be done and Everybody was sure that Somebody would do it. Anybody could have done it, but Nobody did it. Somebody got angry about that because it was Everybody's job. Everybody thought that Anybody could do it, but Nobody realized that Everybody wouldn't do it. It ended up that Everybody blamed Somebody when Nobody did what Anybody could have done

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What's funnier than a dead triceratops? Nothing, nothing at all...in fact this is scary because the triceratops and their other Cretaceous herbivores, have been extinct for over 3.5 trillion years... ........also if you see a dead triceratops, you're probably tripping on LSD.........

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Why couldnt the kid see the pirate movie? Because he didn't have eyes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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