How did the fat woman survive the car accident? She had on her seat belt.

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What did the farmer say to the woodchucks chucking his wood? Excuse me, not to be rude but i worked very hard splitting and stacking that wood and would appreciate it if you would stop throwing it in the water.

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Niki Minaj's ass

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roses are gray violets are gray everything's gray I'm a #$%ing dog

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What do you call a black guy flying an airplane? A pilot.

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A man was driving five penguins across the Croatian-Serbian border. He was a penguin smuggler.

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What did God say to Noah? "Hi."

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Who's a looser and has no friends??? Max!!! His address is 2131 HighHills Narrow...

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your mom is so blind she cant read.

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If a tree falls on a cat in the woods, does it make a sound? Yes and no, the tree falling makes a loud noise, but the cat under it is instantly killed, preventing any sound that would of been made by the now crushed feline.

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This is a little story about four people named Everybody, Somebody, Anybody, and Nobody. There was an important job to be done and Everybody was sure that Somebody would do it. Anybody could have done it, but Nobody did it. Somebody got angry about that because it was Everybody's job. Everybody thought that Anybody could do it, but Nobody realized that Everybody wouldn't do it. It ended up that Everybody blamed Somebody when Nobody did what Anybody could have done

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Q:What did the furry say to the other? A: Probably nothing, cant be easy speaking with a dick in your mouth...

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A brown haired girl and a blonde girl are driving through a cornfield. Because of this illegal activity, they are sent to court and given 8 years in the state prison.

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Why did the boy have cable? I don't know.

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why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the retard's house *knock knock* who's there? the chicken

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Q. Why did the middle-aged man need glasses? A. The man's father had poor eyesight and therefore could not see well without the help of glasses.

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Why didn't the blonde make it in a gun circle? The blonde yelled "Fire"

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What's green and has wheels? A green car.

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Nock Nock It's open.

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What's funnier than the world ending? Ray Charles and Stevie Wonder in a staring contest.

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What did the young boy get His dad for fathers day? Nothing, his dad died from a very aggresive cancer

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why did the disabled man go to the shops? because he wanted a radiator panel

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whats the difference between a pizza and a Jew?... Nevermind, that was a stupid question.

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How do you do you cure cancer? Very carefully.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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