How do you stop a clown from laughing? You hit it in the face with an axe.

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What do you call a guy who answers your door Whatever his name his

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Whats Black and White all Over? Ask Your Mother

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why is the black man black? because he isnit white

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How do you fit 4 homosexuals onto a barstool? You make the barstool wider allowing for all the men to sit more comfortably on top of the stool.

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"KNOCK KNOCK". I opened the door to greet my guests for the party.

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Why did Alice fail Maths? Because everybody else was Asian.

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Spongebob: Patrick! Can you hear me? Patrick: No, it's too dark.

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Why did ned fall out of the tree? Because he was hit by a koala.

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Friends are like potatoes. If you eat them, they die.

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? A treadmill... did I mention he was kinda fat?

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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What do you get when you cross an orangatang with a grizzly bear? Nothing, they just walk past each other unless the bear eats the shit out of the monkey then feeds it to her cubs

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A man walks into a doctors office. The doctor says "I've got good news and bad news. Which do you want first?" The man responds "Let's hear the good news." The doctor says "I ran a series of tests and found you have leukemia, but your insurance paid for everything." Shocked, the man asks "What's the bad news?" The doctor answers "Your company is switching to a private insurer and because of your pre-existing condition you've been denied coverage. None of your future treatments will be covered."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Unfortunately there are billions of chickens in the world and based on the question it is not possible to determine which specific chicken is being referred to. Even if we were able to ascertain this knowledge it would be unlikely that we could determine its purpose, as chickens don't usually make decisions based on logical thought.

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If pro is the opposite of con, then what is the opposite of progress? Digress

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The Mexican word of the day is JUICY. Tell me if juicy see the cops.

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Whats the difference imbetween a watermelon and a baby? One is fun to hit with a sledge hammer an the other is a watermelon

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? because she was SHITFACED!!!!

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why did the homeless man buy a mansion? he didn't. i lied. he would need a job to be able to buy a mansion.

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Nobody knows why she swallowed the fly, she probably won't die.

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woman's rights

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Q: What's worse than a rainy day? A:

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how can you tell if your moms fat? if Dora can't explore her (mx)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops