Why was the little boy crying? Because a stranger shoved explosives up his butthole.

Why did the lizard cross the road? Because he was stapled to the chicken.

What is the difference between Boyscouts and Jews? Boyscouts come home from camp.

An old couple walks up to me and says, "can you take our picture? It's our 50th anniversary." I reply, "sure." Then I pull the man to the side and ask, "how do you make a relationship last so long? I can't make one last 50 days let alone years." He leans in and says, "cheat"

Q: Why did Sally not like her trip to Hawaii? A: A volcano erupted and killed her whole family.

why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because it was DEAD!

What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? Hi.

What is black and white and red all over? A Zebra that has been fatally maimed by a hungry lion.

There once was a man from Nantucket But then he moved to Boston and changes his name to "man from Boston"

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she has no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? Not Suzie

Trees are like friends. They both fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe.

Nicole Ritchie walks into a grocery store.

What's worse than 12 dead babies in one trash can? 1 dead baby in 12 trash cans.

- What's the difference between a gay man and a refrigerator? - The refrigerator doesn't fart when you take your meat out.

This is a little story about four people named Everybody, Somebody, Anybody, and Nobody. There was an important job to be done and Everybody was sure that Somebody would do it. Anybody could have done it, but Nobody did it. Somebody got angry about that because it was Everybody's job. Everybody thought that Anybody could do it, but Nobody realized that Everybody wouldn't do it. It ended up that Everybody blamed Somebody when Nobody did what Anybody could have done

Roses are Red Violets are plucked So are my nose-hairs Pretty disgusting

69

what the difference between matthew and a retard? The retard can do math

Romans rights.

"What would you do if i gave you a million dollars?" "I would scream and jump up and down? Are you really gonna give me a million dollars?" "No i just wanted to see what you would have said, that's all"

The 17 year old buy called his computers support number to remove a virus from his old computer, so he can gift the computer to his little cousin for his birthday. But before giving the computer to his cousin he downloaded over 120 hours of adult film onto it.

How do you drown a black man? You refuse to help him due to your pride and therefore you are no longer a decent member of society.

Your mom is absolutely pefect. This makes me love HIM.

Why did little Timmy drop his ice cream? He was hit by a bus.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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