Cashier: Have a nice day sir! Grumpy man: Don't tell me what kind of day to have ya fruit!

A guy walks into a bar, but a metal bar, he hurts his head, he goes to the hospital to get an x-ray, Turns out he hard a brain tumor, He died the next day,

A little boy starts to be followed by a man in a large white van. They come across an intersection, the boy turns left, and the man turns right.

Your Mom.

why did the mexican cross the road? To get into America. Why did the chicken cross the road? It was on its way to warn everyone that the sky was falling Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass. Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? cause he's Chuck Norris. Why did the man get a check in the mail every month? Cause he's black Why did Obama Cross the road? Cause he lost control of congress

What has one eye, three arms and one leg? A really weird person.

nba live 13

How did the Jewish husband and wife stay together forever? They didn't. They ended up in divorce like 50% of all other married couples due to irreconcilable differences.

Their, they're, there You're, your

Why was the little girl blowing bubbles in the swimming pool? Because she was drowning

There are four dead people on a boat. They commit suicide. Why did they commit suicide. To get to the other side!

Roses are black, Violets are black, Everything's black, I'm Blind.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm in your apple.

Why did the black man wear a coat, shirt, pants, and underwear on a rainy day? Because he didn't want to be naked.

Twenty-Four

Wanna hear a joke? Once upon a time, there was a successful Mexican.

Ask if I'm a aardvark. Are you a aardvark? Yes.

what did the blind deaf mute boy get for christmas? some nice presents.

you: guess what somebody: what? you: you have cancer

Some people like melon and others like soup.

What do you call a puppy with no eyes? Ugly.

You know what is funny about r.ape? Nothing. It's horror

What do you call a snake with no arms? Normal. What do you call an amphibian with no arms? A caecilian. What do you call a girl with no arms? A poor, poor soul that is unfortunate enough to have had an amputation when young. Now, she can't go in public without being stared at. She can't catch herself when she trips. She can't ride a bike, bake cookies for her family, or be a NASA astronaut like she always dreamed. She is the normal ASDF Movie character.

What did the children in India eat for dinner?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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