Flying aboriginal on a magic carpet

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Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

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what did the girl who's father was murdered do at her wedding? not have a father daughter dance.

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a dyslexic Satan worshiper sold his soul to Santa

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patty was in sunday school, the teacher asked her "patty who created the universe?" john sliped into the seat next to her and jabbed her with a pen "LORD ALMIGHTY" the teacher said' good patty now who gave himself for us? john again jabbed her with a pin "JESUS CHRIST" "that very good patty now what did mary say to joseph after they had their 23 child?" john jabbed her " IF YOU STICK THAT DAMN THING IN ME ONE MORE TIME ILL BREAK IT IN HALF!!!" the teacher fainted

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69

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Why did George ride his bike to the park? Due to the down economy his parents were forced to sell his bike in order to pay their bills.

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Why was Michael Jackson seen shopping at Kmart? Because he heard little boys pants were 50% off the original price.

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What did the boy with cancer get for christmas Nothing he didnt live that long

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Q: Why did the cookie go to the doctor? A: Because he had brain cancer.

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what does a gorilla do when it sleeps. it snores.

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What did the man say when he found out he had cancer? Nothing. He was so in shock, that he later died from another type of cancer.

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How many black men does it take to change a light bulb? Just one, you racist.

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Q: What do you do if A bunch Of black Guys Are raping a white Girl A: Throw A Basketball at them.

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Roused are red violets are blue I just s*** in my own poo

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what did the little boy say to little girl? I shit bricks.

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? It was hit by an oncoming motorist in a busy intersection.

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How are friends like bananas? If you peel off their skin and eat them, they die.

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What's the difference between an orange and a dead baby? One is a popular citrus fruit commonly grown in Florida, and the other is a horrible tragedy, possibly caused by miscarriage or a serial killer, who was hopefully immediately jailed for his actions.

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If i could rearrange the alphabet I wouldn't put U and I together. I'd put my dick in your mouth.

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what do you call a homeless man? poor.

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Why did the litle boy's hat come off? cause he got hit by a train!

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Why did Jimmy's sexy teacher ask him to stay behind after class? His grades have been slipping and she expects better from her students. How anyone views her sexually is of no relevance to this situation.

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I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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