What did the baby say to its mother after breastfeeding? Nothing

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A little boy starts to be followed by a man in a large white van. They come across an intersection, the boy turns left, and the man turns right.

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There was this guy who walked in the bar with one shoe. The bartender asks what happened. The man said the shoe didn't fit. So the bartender ask where is the other shoe. The man said he threw it away. The bartender looks in the trashcan and sure enough he sees his other shoe. The bartender says "This is the same size as your other shoe. Why are you wearing one shoe?" The man says "I'm just playing a prank on you. There's a hidden camera over there and over there. Is it okay if I can put you on YouTube?" and the bartender says "No."

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What happened to all of the happy birds flying over the field? They were all suddenly stricken by the bird flu and died.

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Why does Logan Cole beat off to Yo Gabba Gabba! ? Because Tim Tebow.

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A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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what do you call a cow with no legs? ground beef

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How do you make a Nazi mad? You slash his tires.

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Q: What dosent a Jew and a pizza have in commen? A: The pizza dosent scream when you put it in the oven.

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what did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede!

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Two men are sitting on a park bench discussing the anatomy of goats. Where is Bertha? Teaching the principals of mathematics to blind orphins in Moscow, Russia.

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What's worse than stepping on chewing gum A clown throwing bricks at orphans

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Why is this an anti-joke? Are you laughing? Exactly.

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What animal has four legs and one hand? Happy rottweiler

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What do you call a homeless person with one leg? Rob.

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Why did the chicken kill himself? Because he was bullied as a child and is now suicidal

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What's yellow and highly dangerous? Shark-infested banana pudding.

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What did the volcano say to the other volcano? Nothing, Volcanoes are inanimate objects that do not possess the ability to speak.

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I can't see my forehead

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YOU

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What's the difference between a Mexican and a bench? The bench can support a family.

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knock knock ... no one was in

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why is Justin Berber gay? hes not thats rust a myth

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An apple a day keeps the doctor away. What about the vampires?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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