How do you know if there's an elephant in your fridge? The fridge is broken and the elephant has mauled your dog

What's black and fun to hang from trees? Tire swings.

Micheal Jackson walks into a bar?

How are contortionists so flexible? They stretch.

Why can't Abraham Lincoln lie? Because he is dead.

What do a bench and a mexican have in common? (don't worry it's not racist) You'll find both in a park. (I lied)

An early Jewish man walks into a bar where a number of stormtroopers have gathered for drinks and is taken into custody and then delivered by railcar to a camp where he and other persecuted minorities are deliberately imprisoned in a relatively small space with inadequate facilities where they await their mass execution.

What did the priest say to Jesus when he revealed himself on Christmas morning? Happy birthday

Knock knock --Come in.

What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? Names

"Knock Knock" "Whose there?" "It's who's." The grammar nazi has struck again.

"I can't wait to eat this bagle!" "Yes you can." "Yeah, I guess you're right."

Why is Roenz Gay? He isnt.

How long will it take for a dog to paint a color wheel? I don't know.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. It was a dead monkey.

Why couldn't Bethany drive? She was 14.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato

Q: What do you do when your friend tells you he murdered someone? A: Call the police.

Q: what did a kid in harlem get for christmas? A: nothing he got shot

Knock Knock whose there your biological parents REALLY No

What's worse than losing something? Dieing.

why do all good things come to an end? that is one of the mysteries of human existance.

Q:how man ADD kids does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: I dont know, wanna go ride bikes?

Strawberries!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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