What do you say to a black man on fire... Stop, drop and roll !!!

What is a pirate's favorite kind of pizza? Cheese.

finding nemo didnt make sense how could a shark go on a no fish diet

William and Kate do get off their ass and do something useful for once instead of hogging the cover of intouch magazine.

How does a black guy who murdered his wife get out of jail? He serves his sentence and is allowed to return back home.

What's brown and sticky? A penis.

Knock Knock Whos there? The police, we've been getting reports of many ironically named metaphors knocking on your door to which you reply witty utterances, can you explain this frankly quite disturbing behaviour? The police, we've been getting reports of many ironically named metaphors knocking on your door to which you reply witty utterances, can you explain this frankly quite disturbing behaviour who? Wait aren't you the one who's supposed to supposed tell the punchline? Oh Yeah

*Knock Knock* Who's there? Hello, I'm here to deliver your groceries. Ok thank you, please leave them by the front door.

What do a fish and a car have in common? They are both edible.

What did the priest say to the rabbi ? I'm gay.

Im ashamed of being from Canada

What did the catholic priest say to the little boy? Nothing sexual, that kind of behavior isn't as widespread as people think.

a weird guy tickled a watermelon.

Roses are red violets are blue I hate rhyming pancakes

what do you call a disabled black man getting beat up? an unfortunate human

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She never got her drivers license.

A Jew, a Christian and a Muslim walk into a bar. I don't know what happens next, I got the fuck out of there before shit went down

What did the little boy with cancer say right before he died? Nothing. He was very sick and could not speak at all during his final weeks.

a man died

what do you call a pig that knows karate? pork-chop!

An elephant walks into a bar. He nearly levels the entire structure as he forced his way through the front door.

Why can't the t-Rex clap..... Because it is dead

wat?

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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