So Doc... Do I have H.I.V or not? Well... Lets just say you should think positive now... NO! I CANNOT LIVE LIKE THIS *Jumps out window* ...Because the results might not appear correctl... OH you do not have... Where did you go? Phew, Good thing it was first floor! Dont be silly, you dont have an immune system which means you have full blown AIDS

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Why did the the man not take acting? He wasn't good at it.

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What do a fish and a car have in common? They are both edible.

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what is faster than a cheetah? i dont know what? if i knew why would i be asking..

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Yo mama's so stupid.....................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................uh jk

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How many footballs fit in a glass of liquid. none, this football is HUGE!!!

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Poop

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Why was the bear gay. He grew up in a disfunctional home.

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why did the kid fall over and break his neck? Because he slipped on the ice-cream from the kid who got hit by a bus.

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How do you kill a blonde? Stab her.

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What's the difference between Justin Beeber and a Basett hound? I don't know.

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What do you call one black guy surrounded by eleven white guys? Wayne Simmonds

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two goldfish are in a tank they swim around happily and have no consciousness of what is happening because of their short memory.

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Q. What language cant you speak A.Sign language

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Why did the girl throw butter out the window? She was suffering from an epileptic seizure.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was blind and deaf.

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your momma is so poor she had you just for the free milk

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What's rock hard and is sharp? A rock...and my penis.

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Why did the doctor have no peins? She was a woman.

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Knock Knock Who's There? 9/11 9/11 who? You said you'd never forget.

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What's white and sticky? Glue.

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What's the animal that eats with its tail? All of them, since they won't take it off when they get to eat.

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A man violently rapes a small child. Unfortunately the child has aids and gives them to the man.

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What is a pirate's favorite kind of pizza? Cheese.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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