Why did the guy fly? Because he steped on a landmine

A Christian walks in into a bar . . . mitzvah.

Women.

If she's old enough to count, she's probably in second grade.

Your mom's so hairy, she should go to the barber!

A priest and a rabbi are walking down the street when they see an orphanage on fire. "Oh my god!" says the rabbi. "We have to save the children!" "Screw the children!" says the priest. "Out of what?" replies the rabbi.

19 cats 33 hamsters 24 turtles and 23 dogs are all in a small cage, PETA is not happy.

What is another word for a woman that ends in unt. Aunt.

What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Provolone

What time is it when grandpa sits ontop of a telephone pole and throws pineapples at people? Time to go to a nursing home

Your momma's so stupid, her IQ is below average.

What did the midget get for Christmas? A new watch and a gift card for Applebee's.

Whats brown,looks like a.dike,and is a whore. Marcella

What do you call a pen sitting on a counter? A righting utensil not being currently used.

Q. What does McDonald's and Michael Jackson have in common? A. They both stick their meat in 13 year old buns.

You're smart... And I can tell a joke.

how many A.D.D. kids does it take to screw in a lightbulb?lets go play!

Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact? Some men are blind.

An elephant walks into a bar..what the hell

Why couldn't Suzie put on her boots? Because she got her legs amputated.

I AM SO FAT I WANT TO EAT MORE FOOD. I NEED A DOCTOR BECAUSE IM GOING TO END UP LIKE YOUR MOM!

Its a bird...its a plane....it IS a plane

Why was the little girl crying? Her father has been abusing her and her mother for a year now.

Why did samantha die? Because she had cancer.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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