If you like this song so much why don't you marry it? Because a divorce would be tough on the kids

A Black Man walks into a bar...

Whats the worst thing about seeing a truck being snapped in half? It was mine

What did the one horse say to the other. Nothing because horses can't talk.

An Irishman, a homosexual and a Jew walk into a bar. Paddy's really exploring his options lately.

What's the difference between 6 and 7? 1.

Directions- I would be lost without you. Thank you for always being there for me.

Why is six afraid of seven? Six isn't actually afraid of seven. It is true that seven devoured nine's carcass, but one has to understand that cannibalism is not a taboo in their culture. It is ignorant and offensive to judge the world of cardinal numbers, where protein is precious and leaving corpses to rot is dangerously unsanitary, by the standards of human societies.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. Your moms face is turning purple. I'm coming for you.

Roses are blue violets are red I think I'm getting drunk get me to my van

Why did the chicken cross the road? It's coop was faulty and thus it escaped.

A dog walked into the forest and saw a whale in a puddle

What did little jimmy get for Christmas? A box containing the malevolent soul of a 10,000 year-old demon determined to torment his cat.

Two robots walk into a bar, just kidding, they have Polio.

Where's Waldo? Nowhere. Waldo is a fictional character. He doesn't exist.

what did the lawyer say to the doctor? hello.

What do you tell a Woman with black eyes? Nothing you've already told her twice.

Why was the fat man removed from the restaurant? When his date didn't show up he started and crying and proceeded to stab himself with a fork

What did the boy with no hands get for Christmas? Gloves.

Why did the black kid fail his math test? Because he had down syndrome

What's black, white, and red all over? The color scheme. Except for the black and white. They're shades.

what's worse than a dead baby in the bathtub? if the baby was named Grace.

Four rats are smoking in an alley. One rat turns to another and comments, "These are some fine smokes. Where'd ya score these?" The rat holding the pack of Menthols replies, "Off a' Fred." He points to a rotting whale carcass in the road. The other rats are horrified. "How did a whale die in the street?!," they squeak. "He didn't. He died on the beach."

There was a man on a park bench and he saw a duck fly by so he decided to go and see what it was up to. He saw that it was just going for a swim in a near by pond. He died 2 years ago of auto erotic asphyxiation because of a common fetish.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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