How do you know your sister is on her period? - Your dad´s dick tastes like blood.

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Whats worse than a dead baby in a puddle of blood? A dead baby in soup.

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Blue fish occasionally consume large amopunts of the insides of oak trees.

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Why did Johnny stop walking halfway to school? A fridge fell on him.

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What clicks when its out of lead ? A gun Why was the little black boy crying ? He ran out of that grape drank How do you make a dead baby float ? You take your foot of its head How do you know when your life is over ? When you start watching Twilight What is blue and sticky ? Blue Stick What do you get when you mix a dog and a cat ? Shit

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Q. Why did the girl with no legs fall off her bike? A. Somebody threw a refrigerator at her.

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NASA sent a probe to Uranus and wondered why people were laughing.

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what's red, blue, and white all over? The American Flag

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Two men walk into a bar. The third man ducks.

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The original joke: "WATCH OUT FOR THAT HOLE!" "WHAT HOLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!" The anti joke, aka realistic edition: "WATCH OUT FOR THAT HOLE!" "WHAT YAAAAAAAAAAAARGHHHHHHHHH!" The ballon edition: Original: "Balloon! Watch out for that Cactus!" "What Cactussssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss..." (leaking air you slowmo) The anti-joke aka realistic version: "Balloon watch out for that pointy soda!" "What soda *pop*" Moral: None of these where the least realistic!

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple finding half a worm in your apple.

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A walrus walks into a bar

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Why did the fat lady poop on my knee? Because i'm thirsty.

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Why did the black man not tip his waiter? Because she provided terrible service and was undeserving.

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What's the best way to pick up girls? Lift with your legs, not your back.

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Four blondes are driving to Disney World. When they are in Florida, there is a sign that says "Disney left" Upset, they make a u-turn and go home.

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What do you call a dead prostitute? - You (or friends name) in 10 years

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THEY SAY SEEING IS BELIEVING. I NEVER SAW 9/11! 9/11? NEVER HAPPENED -Jonathan

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I lost my tractor.

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What did the blind and deaf kid get for Christmas? Leukemia.

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why did Sally fall off of the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there?

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you thought i was going to write a joke.. bitch

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A Haitian walks into a bar. It collapses.

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do you wanna hear a joke about pizza? sure. naw,its too cheesy

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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