How do you stop a clown from laughing? Drive an ax through its head.

What do you call shark with no dorsal fin? Unused ingredients for soup.

Do u liek mudkipz GO TROLLING

What do you call a black man driving a bus? By his name

Give a man a fish, feed him for a week. Teach a man to fish, he'll starve to death. Provide this man a fishing rod, and now finally you're doing something helpful.

Me: Sometimes I like to talk to myself. Me: So do I.

if I was a girl I would be touching my self everywhere if I was a girl as a boy I would make a diffrence in poltics but thats not gonna happen.

What did the snow flake which could talk say to the other snow flake which could talk None of us are the same.

Knock Knock And then I looked through the peephole and I saw it was the handyman that was going to fix my leaky sink so I opened the door

A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf."

I'm Donald Trump! Wump wump wump!

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was unaware that it could get run over by a motor vehicle.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse does not respond because it is a horse, thus lacking cognitive capacity to speak nor understand English. It is confused by its surroundings and promptly defecates on the floor then gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few chairs and tables.

Q. What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? A. One's a scum-sucking bottom feeder, and the other's a highly trained professional skilled in the art of litigation.

Guess What? What? The gludeus maximus of an avian farm bird

what does gum eat ? gum you idiot!

Whats big, hard, and in my pants? A tumor.

A man walks into a bar and asks for a shot. The bartender says ok, then hands him a pistol, then the man shoots the bartender and kills him.

your mama is so greasy she should go take a bath

a man is having trouble getting onto the internet on his home computer. so he he calls a computer technician to help him. \

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven had an extra penis.

A serial killer kills a family of 5 He is never found and eventually kills himself from depression

A fat man and his dog walk into a bar...the man buys a beer and walks out

why was tommy so sad?............because he had a frog stapled to his face.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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