John and Mary had never met. They were like two hummingbirds who had also never met.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I wouldn't consider Mark a chicken. In fact, given the high speed and volume of cars traversing that particular road in both directions, I'd say it was a ballsy move. In hindsight, though, he probably should have waited for the "walk" symbol to appear for pedestrians, in order to avoid being run over by a bus. Anyway, if Pastor John would like to say a few words before we finally put Mark's body to rest...

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when geese fly in a V patteren why is on side longer than the other? not as many geese on that side

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Knock knock Who's there? Joke Joke who? Auntie Joke Great, could you bake me those cookies I like.

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Aodhan peanut head Hearty

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What's black and has been free since the 1700's? What? I don't know, i was asking you.

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A women in her kitchen hears a thud outside. Her husband fell off the roof.

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Why can't you tell Knock-Knock jokes in a Japanese farmhouse? Because your fist will go through the rice paper.

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You mamma so fat, she should consider going on a diet.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Frostbite.

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On Friday the 13th,I had one of those dreams of when you go to school in your underwear. I then realised it wasn't a dream.

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Why can't the man have babies? His nuts was cut off and he eventually bleed to death.

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a person smokes weed... and gets high

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The bartender is institutionalized for paranoid schizophrenia.

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Vagina jokes aren't funny. Period.

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what's orange, round, that like to play and kill poeple and not in a video game? a) a freaking orange b) a super ball c) a dog painted in orange d) samus aran e) none of the previous answer

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once upon a time, a bird fell in love with a fish.. they both died.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was black

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What time is it when an elephant sits on your watch? I don't know, I don't have a watch anymore.

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what did one muffin say to the other in the oven? Nothing because they were both baked at 500 degrees and died

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What did the greeter at walmart say to the black man? Welcome to walmart.

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Whats worse than having aids...... Being in school

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Why did the Mexican drive off a cliff Because he lost control of his vehicle which resulted in an unplanned trajectory causing his car to divert from the intended course and thus veer off the road onto the cliff

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What's the difference between a turtle and a horse? The horse has no shell.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops