what do you call a cow with no legs? ground beef

Man 1: WHAT THE HELL?!?! Man 2: There is no verb in that sentence

What do you call 500,000 white guys jumping out of a plane? There's no such thing. 500,000 people can't fit onto one plane.

Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.

How do you kill a blonde? you shoot her.

21

What happened to the lady with cancer?? She got shot!!

*prepares this to get negged*

Yes!

Knock knock. Is someone there?

Type 2 diabetics

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is black

Why did the leprechaun cross the road? If you still believe in leprechauns, you need to see a doctor.

There is a bomb. It blows up and kills 26 people.

There's a redhead, a brunette and a woman with green hair walking down the street. A man asks them how they all came to have such beautiful and vibrant hair color. The redhead smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The brunette smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The woman with green hair blows her nose, and replies "It isn't natural, I'm rebelling against society's conformist ideals. Also I was not loved enough as a child." She has a cold.

Why did the chiocken cross the road? There's no such thing as a chiocken.

What did the father say to his gay son? "Finish your homework."

What did the children in India eat for dinner?

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she didn't have arms. Knock. Knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

What do you call to guys who gave gave each other HIV? Blood-Brothers

JLo made a song about my diick- "On the Floor"

What did the pet lion say to its owner? Nothing. The lion then proceeded to hunt down its owner, pin him down and rip out his insides. Besides, the likelyhood of owning a lion as a pet is very slim, and even if one did, this act would be highly illegal in most parts of the world.

knock, knock! who`s there? it`s me ! who me? yes!

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting cancer from a horse.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...