Q: What do you do when your friend tells you he murdered someone? A: Call the police.

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What's black and flies? Whatever it is, it's not a car.

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What goes up and does not come down? Why the hell ask me.

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A student goes up to the teacher because he has to go to the washroom. The teacher tells him that he has to sing the ABC's before he can go. So the boy sings, "ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ." The teacher said he did a perfect job and could go to the washroom. The boy went on to become a billionaire. Congrats!

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Why is it impossible to travel faster than the speed of light? Because it travels pretty darn fast.

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IM SEXY AND I KNOW IT Chrysanthemums are pretty but toads and people are damn to horny

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Why was Osama Bin Laden killed? Because he couldn't dodge all the bullets in time

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Q: What's the difference between a vampire and a lawyer? A: A lot of things.

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Q: What do you call a bunch of blondes standing ear to ear? A: A wind tunnel!

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I like hats XD!

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whose better then Sarah, Georgia and ellie NO ONE!!!!

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Whats Something everyone has except david? Money.

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Why was seven afraid of eight? Because eight nine ten.

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What happened when the Neo-Nazi ran into a group of black people? He listened to their struggles, heard their stories, accepted their diversity and eventually hung up his hateful ways.

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whats white, blue, and red all over? a white guy in the ghetto

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A black man, a Mexican man and a white man walk into a bank. The black man reaches into his bag and pulls out his bank card, the Mexican and the the white man do the same as they need to withdraw money.

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Pee Pee bleekkka klup look? fupapapapapapapapap

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Your momma's so dumb, she had to spend an extra hour studying for her mathematics test.

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From the makers of Call of Duty 1, comes Call of Duty 2.

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Q: How do you stop a rhino from charging? A: The construction of a steel-reinforced concrete wall will work in most instances, but for more resistant cases, the use of a high-impact titanium anti-rhino charging barrier is required.

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Yo momma's so fat, her lifespan is probably going to be very short and you will have to bury her soon.

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Yo momma's so fat that when she went to Seaworld and a whale saw her, looked away, and continued on with its daily life.

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How do you get a dog off of your roof? Shoot it.

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What did the quarter say to the dime? nothing.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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