Why did the cancer patient shave his head? He wanted to pretend he still had hair.

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? The answer is not definitive and involves several factors including the size of the woodchuck, the woodchuck's teeth, the climate in which that woodchuck lives, and the tenacity of that particular woodchuck at achieving his goal.

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what happens when 15 babies cross the street? well, some may be hit by cars. others will have to face the harsh life of reality.

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so a horse walks into a bar right, and he goes up to the bartender, and the bartender being a smartass says why the long face(get because hes a horse), and the horse says his wife is dying of lung cancer, child services are taking his kids away , and im addicted to crack and that is why i have a long face the bartender then gives him the next round for free and the the horse dies of alchohol poisoning

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Why does one not simply walk into Mordor? Mordor doesn't really exist and thus is physically impossible to walk into, or enter by any means really.

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How do you know your cat is gay? Other cats have buttsex with him

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What did the iceberg say when Titanic crashed on it? "Yeah!"

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what did the jewish kid get for his birthday......Striped pajamas

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What's yellow and lays in a tree? Tweety the Whore

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"Knock Knock" "Whose there?" "It's who's." The grammar nazi has struck again.

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Whats worse than finding a spider in your shower? Getting repeatedly stabbed in the dick by a rapid chipmunk.

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what did the asain have for dinner? A: rice

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Q. what does a metal slinkey and a retarded person have in common? A. you will smile watching one fall down the steps

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How do you get a black man to use a condom? You explain to him all the benefits of safe sex.

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YEAH THEY DO.

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Two men and a woman jump out of a plane. They forgot their parachutes and all died.

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Knock Knock Who's There? Your Best friend. Did you forget what I looked like?

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Q: Where did little Suzie go during the bombing? A:Everywhere

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Why couldn't the young pirate get in to the movie? Because he wasn't old enough.

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Q: Why is 6 afraid of 7? A: Because 7 is a serial killer.

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A dog walked into the forest and saw a whale in a puddle

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Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A mosquito is a common insect in the family Culicidae. A blonde on the other hand is a Homo sapiens, a primate species of mammal with a highly developed brain, belonging to the family of great apes, along with chimpanzees, bonobos, gorillas, and orangutans

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hi

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What's black, white, and red all over? The color scheme. Except for the black and white. They're shades.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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