Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the hospital? A: The victim of a violent mob attack

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What did the whale say when he ran into a wall? - Oh Shit

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A white man walking dpwn the street finds a brief-case with a timer on it. A young muslim man says he dropped it. The white man then asked "What's the timer for"? The young man said, "Nothing really, just helps keep the time." They both went their separate ways.

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Why did the man fall from the sky? Because he was dead.

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What's the difference between a duck?

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Womens Rights.

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"Penis, penis, penis..." says Chase. That is all he likes and he fondles horse testes.

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What do men and women have in common? They're both respected members of society, besides women.

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What do you call a really small grape? A grape.

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guess what? chicken butt.

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Why can't Helen Keller hear? She's dead

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knock knock who's there? a murderer. a murderer who? a murderer who kills you and your family.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Suicide.

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If life gives you lemons, steal the declaration of independance and use the lemons and a hair dryer to reveal the numbers on the back. Then enbark on an epic journey that ends with the discovery of the templars treasure. Lastly, use the money you earned to buy some lemons and make some lemonade.

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Why did the first squirrel fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one. Why did the third squirrel fall out of the tree? Peer Pressure. Why did Bobby fall off his bike? He was hit by 4 squirrels Why did bobby die? He was hit by a bus

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http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=LJP1DphOWPs#!

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks "what would you like to drink?". The horse, unable to comprehend english, just nods and proceeds to shit on the floor

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot.

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What do you call a Mexican on a boat? A sailor

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What's Brown and Sticky? A stick.

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i got angry and i was like " i really want to kick someone" ,my friend was on the ground and shes like "you can kick me" ,and i'm like "REALLY" ,then i kicked her really hard and she cried...

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Why did the guy throw a clock out his window? Because he was mentally unstable and needs help.

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Your mamas so fat. She fat.

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why did little johnny scream. he was getting torn to pieces

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops