why did the chicken cross the road? because it had earlier escaped from its cage and had since began to wonder around the local town

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Two drums and a cymbol fall off a cliff... ba bum BUM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA it used to be ba dum ching but im so funny that i changed it to ba dum bum. credit to Alex H

thumb_up thumb_down +6

what is the only death better than asama bin ladin JUSTIN BIEBER'S

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the chicken cross the road? To see his brother im dying of leukemia.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the guy fly? Because he steped on a landmine

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why couldn't sally go on the swing? Because she has no arms. Knock knock Who's there Sally

thumb_up thumb_down +4

How do you confuse a blonde? Speak to her in a nonsensical language of gibberish you have devised without her being able to understand or translate.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

(speaking to an orphan) knock, knock who's there not your parents

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What did the man with Tourette's say to the other man? Surely something he did not mean to say.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Civil Rights.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

what is worse than finding a worm in your apple the earth exploding

thumb_up thumb_down +4

I added ICE to WKD it was WICKED

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Wanna here a joke? Canadians.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Waht do chinease people and gambling machines have in common? They both say chink chink chink chink chink chinck

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the white kids accept Morgan Freeman as a kid? All of his school-mates looked up to him

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's big and fat? An obese man.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

milly, milly, milly, cat

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Chuck Norris doesn't swim... He never learned

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Q. What does McDonald's and Michael Jackson have in common? A. They both stick their meat in 13 year old buns.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What time is it when grandpa sits ontop of a telephone pole and throws pineapples at people? Time to go to a nursing home

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Hey I just met you And I am crazy So I will kill you And eat your body

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A momma cow was grazing in the meadow with her three calves when the first one asked, "Mom, how did I get the name Rose? "Well when you were born, a rose pedal came floating in the breeze and landed on your head." The second calf asked, "How did I get the name Daisy?" "Well when you were born, a daisy came floating in the breeze and landed on your head." The third calf mumbled, "LKJLSKJFSLKJLKSJDF" incoherently, and the Mom responded, "Shut up, Cinderblock."

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Patrick- hey spongebob i thought of something even funnier then 24 Spongebob- What patrick- 25

thumb_up thumb_down +2

See now that is confident and down to earth, reasonable, and all the etc etc`s, so what would you like me to fill them in with? Joking aside, you are smart, funny, you take a beating (sorry that`s today`s new low point, I have never hit a woman and never will, sure I punched down the GigaLesb when she lifted me up and my spine started making cracking noises, but that does not technically count as a woman). You are sweet, you are cute, you are funny, you are hot hot hot (hattrick see?), and yeah yeah if you want me to prove to people here that we know each other, sure, I met you once like 15 years ago? You kinda adored me, I could not take my eyes of yours (oh yeah, you got adorable eyes sure), and... You got huge breasts (Tits are more like those hanging you know what I mean) Sigh sometimes a boy wonders what he is doing with his life, he falls for the strangest girls... ...AND THEN SAID BOY FINDS HIMSELF BROKEN IN TWINE BY ME!

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops