Jimmy went to a bar, to see a stand up comedian, he heard the standup comedian tell a funny joke, so after the show, he went home and told his wife the joke and after that he said, i made that up, im funny arent i, the wife seemed shifty, so she googled the joke and found the stand up comedians joke, giggled and then proceeded to continue back angrily to Jimmy, because he just did the wrong thing, she slapped Jimmy in the face, divorced Jimmy and killed his 3 children because Jimmy plagurised, and plagurism is illegal, and now Jimmy has no children, and a red mark on his cheek and knows he did the wrong thing don't smoke kids

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What's the difference between a Jew and a Boy Scout? Boy Scouts come home from camp.

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How do you survive the plague? you dont.

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What do you get when you cross a horse and a donkey? a mule

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Ask me if I'm an orange. Are you an orange? No.

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knock knock who's there Berry Joe Berry Joe who? I just told you, Berry Joe. oh.

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Knock, Knock! Who's There? Your neighbor, I found your lost cat! Oh thanks!

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Q. What did the man say when his car broke down. A. Damn it, my car broke down.

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Why was it sad that the kid was playing football? He had no arms and legs and he was the football.

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What time is it when an elephant sits on your car? 12:00

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What's worse that finding a worm in your apple? Half the holocaust

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what do you call a man with no legs? disabled.

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GAME OVER!!!!!! OF COURSE!!!!!! I BEHELD AS SATAN FELL FROM THE SKY..: LIKE LIGHTNIIIIIIIIIIIING! Street Fighter 2: The (antijoke) Movie. Moral: Raul Julia, you are the man, rest in peace dude you made that movie a masterpiece, do not give this a thumbs up for me, but for the most brilliant performance he ever gave.

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Two muffins are in an oven. The oven is set to 425 degrees farenheit. The two muffins are taken out of the oven once cooked, and enjoyed by the couple who cooked them.

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Roses are black, Violets are black, Everything's black, I'm Blind.

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Q: What's the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? A: I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

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Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, your wife and kids die.

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A priest walks past a mailbox with the number 666 on it. Nothing happens, because it is an ordinary mailbox.

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i cant think of one.

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What do you get if you cross a bulldog with a schitzu? A half breed prone to allergies and breathing problems.

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I was walking through the woods the other day when I heard a rustle in the bushes... So I went over and said, "Russell, What are you doing in the bushes?"

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Tic tac toe. You were adopted.

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Why didnt the chicken cross the road? -Its a chicken you dumb shit.

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Why did the rabbit cross the road? I don't know, I was asking you.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops