A girl dropped her pencil while sitting next to her bf... She glanced at his phone while he was texting a message that said "I love you"... The girl jumped up and called him every name she could think of and left the room... The message was to his mother! She didn't listen and left him... He killed himself because she left him... She killed herself because he killed himself... Moral of the story: Don't drop you pencil!

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Why can't Helen Keller Drive? Because she's a women. Why can't Stephen Hawking speak freely with his voice? Because he's autistic.

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Whats brown and sticky? Shit.

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How many dead babies can fit in a dead horse 11

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3 men check in to a motel. They all decide to leave given the eminent danger of being the butt of a homosexual joke.

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Mary had a little lamb... that's what she gets for having intercourse with the farm animals.

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Your mother is so stupid, she is unable to uphold a steady job and cannot support you financially.

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Q: How many years does it take for a deer to grow into a moose? A: 7

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Remember when the whole country was sad because Marget Thatcher died? No, me neither.

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What did one deaf mute say to the other deaf mute?

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Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain. Chuck promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense.

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Why did 0 dislike 1? Because 1 made 0 feel like he was nothing

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Ed has spent all his days on the farm. It was the farm of his father and grandfather before him; long have they prospered from the fruits of this land. He has a wife and 3 beautiful children, all of whom live happily on the farm. Ed still manages to keep an active social life, and has lots of interesting friends. His best friend is Moe. As a young man, Ed had spent a few years living in the city for his studies. Moe lives in the city, and he knows Ed from College. One day, Moe came out to the farm to have lunch with his old friend. After lunch, he and Ed took a walk around the farm. They passed by the horses, the chickens, the pigs and finally they came to the cows. Ed looked at Moe, and he saw that he was focused intently on a single cow. "What's the matter, Moe?" he asked. "That," Moe said, "is one skinny cow."

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Q: What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs, living in the mountains? A: Cliff Q: What do you call a girl with no arms and no legs, living on the beach? A: Sandy Q: What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs hanging on a wall? A: A victim of a serious crime, where murder was committed and the killer has a sick and twisted mind because he first cut off the man's arms and legs then nailed him to the wall with wooden pegs. Puppies.

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Michal j. fox has Parkinsons disease. He is tired of losing at jenga

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here is Stevie Wonder's poem: sjkgfhdujduehfheuefeufhhf uefuefg eufbejfbefehfehutuge' wiohl;wreohqweiothurelwueths sjtghekltrhlsdifhlziurhlsiurhtwoli

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Charlie Sheen walks into a bar... Every morning, and stays until it closes... [credit gilbert gottfried]

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What do you get when you mix a panda,oklahoma,and a handle? The oklahoma panhandle.

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Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? He was ferociously raped by a bear.

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What's red and green and goes 100 mph? A fast car that's painted red and green...

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http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=341666429240797&set=a.102107073196735.4429.102099916530784&type=1&theater

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Q: How does a robber get into your house? A: Through a door.

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Yo momma's so fat, she slipped into a diabetic coma.

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Q:How did the blonde commit suicide? A: She didn't, she sought help and was able to live a very happy life with a beautiful family in a nice suburb outside of Cincinnati.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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