If life gives you melons you're dyslexic.

Man walks into a gun store, buys a gun. The same man goes home and lives happily till he dies of cancer. His son takes the gun shots himself, survives then later dies of cancer.

What do you call a black guy and a mexican guy walking into a bar, A couple of multicultural friends grabbin' a drink.

What do a duck and a bicycle have in common? They both have handlebars, except for the duck.

What did the Democrat say to the Republican? "I am sorry about your mother". They had been good friends since childhood and the Republicans mother was soon to die from terminal cancer.

two nuns were driving in Transylvania when a vampire jumps out in front of their car the first nun said "show it your cross" so the secong got out of the car and yelled Get out of the way you pric!!!!

What is the difference between Michael Jackson and Neil Armstrong? Neil Armstrong was the first man to walk on the moon, and Michael Jackson molested boys.

Why did the chicken cross the road? why? Womens rights

Why did the redneck ask his daughter to get on her knees? His shoe was untied.

One day Satan, approached his dad and said: DADDY I love you so much, I want to be just like you! That story did not end up so well did it?

A white guy, a black guy, and a spanish guy jump off a building. They all die on impact and their families mourn their loss for years to come.

Why did the baboon fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

what did the parapelegic (limbless) kid get for his birthday? Heart failure

A man walks into a doctors and says 'Doctor, Doctor, I have a bad stomach ache' Upon hearing this, the doctor writes the man a prescription for medication and wishes him a swift recovery.

Knock Knock Who's there? A mormon *slam*

I like my women like I like my coffee Without a penis

why do birds fly away when you go near them? incase your black

Two men are sitting on a park bench discussing the anatomy of goats. Where is Bertha? Teaching the principals of mathematics to blind orphins in Moscow, Russia.

Why was the little boy late to church? He was getting raped by the priest. ....the priest was late too.

Whats the best way to get chewing gum out of your hair? Cancer.

Q: What is the difference between a duck? A: That question doesn't make any sense.

Knock Knock Whos there? Jonny Jonny who? Jonny tsunami, hope you can swim Japan

How do you scare a blonde woman? Tie her up and mutilate her family while she watches.

Whats the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I dont have a Ferrari in my garage.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...