your father died

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Roses are red. Violets are purple. Haha. Purple.

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Knock Knock It's the police, im afraid your wife has been killed in a horrible car accident.

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What's green and has wheels? A green car.

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What's purple and has four wheels? A frog, except for the purple and four wheels part.

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Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

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Whats worse than than falling in a puddle on the way to a meeting? Getting shot while your at that meeting.

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A: B: No pun intended.

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Why are chaos theorists so predictable? Because their arguments usually follow a logical set of points.

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Why did the baby cry? Because his parents dropped him on his head.

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What's worse than a rainy day? Dropping the soap

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How did the guy feel after his wife died? Pretty shitty, I'd imagine..

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A dyslexic woman goes into a saloon and asks for a hair cut. Oh right, she doesn't have hair! Then why the f*** would she enter the saloon? Because she wanted to get her nails done. But she doesn't have nails either, and she doesn't want to drink. She came there because she wanted to hook up with a guy!

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Roses are red Violets are blue I rather sleep in the class Like a boss in the school -HairyBoss

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Why did the boys uncle stop calling him? His uncle died of cancer 3 months ago.

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Knock Knock Whose there? Nobody Nobody who?

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A man walk into a bar. He then falls down, quickly picks himself up, and continues his life.

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I was visiting my grandad the other day and my phone died, I was really bored, he told me I rely too much on technology I replied with 'no you do' and Unplugged his life support

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Why couldn't the unicorn fly? It was a horse.

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Why was the skeleton afraid to cross the road? He wasn't, and in fact was entirely unaware that said road existed given the fact that he was deceased; and therefore lacked any sensory organs and motor functions associated with crossing roads.

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THE GAME

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What happened to your face? I walked into a tree

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i ate and i ate and i was sick on the floor 8x8=64

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"I have some good news and some bad news, which do you want to hear first?" The good news. "There is no bad news." Then what's the bad news? "There is no bad news.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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