What is green, has four legs, and if it falls out of a tree it can hurt you? A pool table.

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What's red and hurts you? A brick.

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Two men walk into a bar, they weren't looking where they were going.

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Knock knock Who's there? 7. And if that's you in there, 6, you better start praying.

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How much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? 17

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what did the blind deaf mute boy get for christmas? some nice presents.

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Why are pirates called pirates? Because it derives from the Latin word, pirata.

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An Asian walks out of the library.

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A man met a genie that granted him three wishes. I wish I could fly. The genie gave him a plane ticket. No, I want to really fly for real! The genie put him inside a plane. Okay, I wish I was unable to die then! The genie killed him. Moral: Not every story needs to make a fucking sense.

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A child rides by his mother on his bicycle and says "Look Mom, no hands!" The child doesn't come back, and night falls but he has yet to come home. His mother calls the police and a search begins 2 days later. He is never found is presumed dead.

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A Mexican and a black guy are in a car. Who's driving? The black guy because the Mexicans was recently aressted for a dwi and had his repealed. But lately he has worked towards cleaning his life up. They were actually driving to an AA meeting.

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What happened to the guy who got bullied? He commited suicide.

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Hello

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Why couldn't little Jessica open the door? It was locked

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Do you like flowers NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO NOW GET ME A COKE! And a pizza

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Knock Knock Who's There? Robin Robin Who? Robin Williams Whoa, too early bro

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What do you call something that has two legs, arms and is bloody all over? My ex's new boyfriend.

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How do you get a clown of a swing? Hit it with an ax.

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roses are red violets are black i hope your chest is not as flat as your back.

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Straight men can be bronies.

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why did the baby start crying? someone threw a brick at it

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whats the difference between a pizza and a Jew?... Nevermind, that was a stupid question.

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What's the difference between jelly and jam? Jelly is made from the juice of the fruit while jam is made from the pulp of the fruit.

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a blonde, a brunette and a red head are robbing a bank, they hear the police coming, so they try to find a place to hide. The red head hides in cat cage, the brunette hides in dog cage and the blonde hides in potatoe sack. When the police come the brunetter says "Woof, Woof!" the red head says "MEOW! MEOW!" and the blonde says "P-O-T-A-T-O-E!"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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