whats red that looks like ketchup taste like ketchup and is't tomato sorce? ketchup

thumb_up thumb_down

Why didn't the man eat the carrots? Because he was a vegetarian.

thumb_up thumb_down

What's brown and sticky? Human excrement.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

why did the little girl fall off the swing - she had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

hi

thumb_up thumb_down -30

I dont no the difference between their and there

thumb_up thumb_down -34

JFK

thumb_up thumb_down -44

Why did a young boy fall off a building? Gravity.

thumb_up thumb_down -54

Knock Knock Who's There? 9/11 9/11 who? You said you'd never forget.

thumb_up thumb_down +85

A man walks into a school, he then proceeds to gun down the majority of the students before taking his own life. What a sad, sad day.

thumb_up thumb_down +49

Q: What's Lindsay Lohan getting for Christmas? A: AIDS

thumb_up thumb_down +41

What did the the policeman say to the band member who trashed a hotel room? "You're under arrest" The band member replied "Well, you're under a vest" The policeman reiterates that this isn't the time to be making any jokes and that vandalism is a very serious offence

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What's the difference between a lawyer and a leech? One is a blood-sucking parasite, and the other practices law for a living.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Ya know how when geese fly in a V-shape, one side is longer than the other? -Yes Do you know why that is? -No Because there's more geese on that side

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What has wheels and spins round and round? A dog in a wheelchair.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Mary Lu was swinging on a swing * swush swush* and her mom was sweeping the porch when she sad Mary Lu go get that big fat shiny quarter on that road then Mary Lu say how about you get your self that big fat shiny quarter.! Her mom drop the broom in discussed and walkout into the road and was bout to bend down when swush a bus runs her over And Mary Lu just laughed and laughed she knew that wasn't a big fat shiny quarter it was a nickel!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What would you get if I your donkey ate my chickens legs? A court order to have them seperated.

thumb_up thumb_down -109

What's white and sticky? Glue.

thumb_up thumb_down +60

What does Helen Keller put at the end of every sentence? A period.

thumb_up thumb_down +58

There once was a man from Nantucket. He still lives there.

thumb_up thumb_down +48

Paperclip... BANANA?!

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Jews.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Once upon a time, your face.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops