Q: What did the bartender say to the Arab as he was walking in? A: Nothing, the bomb had already killed them both.

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What is the favorite song of Lady Di? no, that is a dead person and must be respected.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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Am I the boss.No I was just offered the job

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme Others don't

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Why did the man shut up? because he was told to

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what is hollow and bloody? Vagina when it gets genital herpes

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What happens when you put a squid in the microwave? It dies.

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Why did the doctor have no peins? She was a woman.

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"Knock Knock" "Who the hell is it?" "Patri..." "Go the hell away!"

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What is the difference between a cow and a pig? To get to the other side.

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What's worse than an apple with a worm? Serial Murder.

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Why was Thomas Jefferson chosen to write the Declaration of Independence? He was an educated man and seemed suitable for said job.

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why did the lion get lost? because the jungle is massive.

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Seen the new batman movie? [spoiler] the audience dies

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Two girls are sitting quietly.

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How do you fit 6000000 jews into a car? 1 in the front, 1 in the back and the rest in the ashtray.

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What did little Jimmy say when he met God ? Nothing, God doesn't exist.

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why do pedo's molest children? because it feels really good.

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Why did people spend $100 on Kanye West's plain white T- shirt? Because it was a good looking T-shirt.

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Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? A stimulus in the environment to the receptors in his fingers caused his hand to open no longer gripping the ice cream. Due to this, the ice cream fell to the ground causing a desirable mess for someone to clean up, satisfying themselves with the fact that they have considered the environment during this small ''could happen to anybody'' situation. After the messed was cleaned up, the boy's mother bought him another ice cream, in which case the boy anticipated another potential mess, and held the ice cream carefully. As he did this, he managed to finish eating the whole of the ice cream, allowing no money that was paid for the product to go to waste.

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Once upon a time, there was a gorilla who found Suzie. Suzie was mauled because she had no arms

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Whats worse than the holocaust? Finding your babies head in a microwave

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What do you call one black guy surrounded by eleven white guys? Wayne Simmonds

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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