What has two legs, but cant walk? Steven Hawking

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That dress looks amazing on you considering how fat you are.

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Hi my name is Jim

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What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Nothing. She's already been told twice.

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How do you mess with Helen Keller? Move all the furniture in her room.

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Your mom is so fat, She should go to a doctor because her cholesterol is abnormally high.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I picked them in the meadow this morning

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Whats funnier than 24? Adam Sandler.

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neil patrick harris

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Why is America such a great place to live? It's not North Korea.

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dick in your mouth just kidding haaaaaa

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Curiosity killed the cat and was sentenced to prison for animal abuse.

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The only time your mother was ever considered "hot" was at her cremation.

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Know what's worse than three bee stings? living every day in fear of your schizophrenic hallucinations

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Why did 12 people die when they went to see The Dark Knight Rises movie premiere? Because they were shot and bled profusely resulting in quick, painful death.

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What did the cow say to his friend? Moo.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know. He values his privacy and will not tell me his motives.

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what's worse than a dead baby in the bathtub? if the baby was named Grace.

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What is worse than running away from a rapist? Getting raped by a rapist.

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a black guy a chinese guy a jewish guy and a gay guy are standing on a ledge. they are all ready to jump off and commit suicide. suddenly a basketball falls from the sky. the black guy is like oh shit that my bball. he cant resist, he jumps off the ledge, grabs the ball, spins in mid air, and shoots it through the window that they came out of. then he falls to his death. the other three guys are questioning whether they wanna actually kill themselves when all of a sudden a jiggly dildo flies past. the gay guy sees it, and he needs it in his butthole. he jumps off, grabs the dildo, shoves it in his ass, and falls to his death. the chinese and the jew are the last alive. they decide that they dont want to die and they start crawling back towards the window. then out of nowhere, two quarters and a nickel shoot up from the ground, right in front of them. the jew needs them. he jumps off the ledge and pockets the change. then he falls to his death. the chinese guy is the last one alive. he jumps off and falls to his death.

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What does rainbow stand for? Rick Astley Is Nesting By Our Window to harass us

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Two blonds are driving to Disneyland. While there driving they see a sign "Disneyland: left" So they started crying and headed back home.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Jupiter is the Galaxys biggest planet!

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Q: What kind of bees make milk? A: Boobees

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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