Q: What's the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? A: I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

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Did you hear about the deer? He had antlers. If antlers where a kind of disease, that would be a pun.

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Knock Knock Yes?

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What's worse than a 15 year old getting hit by a car? Adam Johnson

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How do you know it's a Mexican's birthday? They bring cupcakes to school for your entire class to enjoy.

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What do you call a clock with no hands? Broken.

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What do you call a snake with no arms? Normal. What do you call an amphibian with no arms? A caecilian. What do you call a girl with no arms? A poor, poor soul that is unfortunate enough to have had an amputation when young. Now, she can't go in public without being stared at. She can't catch herself when she trips. She can't ride a bike, bake cookies for her family, or be a NASA astronaut like she always dreamed. She is the normal ASDF Movie character.

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Why was the white man poor? Because he could not hold a stable job for his wife and kids.

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Why did the rabbit cross the road? I don't know, I was asking you.

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What do you call a hickey on your shoulder? Bad aim -Cooper Simpson

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What is black, white and red all over? A black, white and red pen.

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Who's a looser and has no friends??? Max!!! His address is 2131 HighHills Narrow...

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How many electricians does it take to change a lightbulb? One.

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Tic tac toe. You were adopted.

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Why do firemen wear red suspenders? If they didn't, their turnout gear would not effectively protect them from flames.

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Daises are red, holy crap my garden is on fire.

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Why do jewish women like to get their sons circumcised? They like anything 25% off.

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What’s black and white and red all over? A zebra in a meat grinder

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What is brown and sticky? A stick.

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If yesterday was friday, today is saturday, what day is it tomorrow? sunday

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Whats worse then losing your phone? The Holocaust

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Why couldn't the blonde screw in the light bulb?? - she happened to be autistic

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A man walks into the doctor's office and says, "Doc, every time I drink coffee, my eye hurts". The Doctor then tells him, "You have an infection called conjunctivitis, also known as pinkeye"

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Knock Knock And then I looked through the peephole and I saw it was the handyman that was going to fix my leaky sink so I opened the door

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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