Why did the the chicken cross the road? Escape.

Knock, Knock. Who's there? Milkman. Milkman who? I've been coming here for 14 years and you don't even know my name? I helped take your mother to the hospital for crying out loud! I held you in my arms as a baby! And you don't even have the decency to remember MY NAME?! I'm sorry I don't live in a house that allows milk and other groceries to be delivered, I'm sorry that I wasn't born into a nice family with a nice home! I'm sorry that I have had to come here EVERY WEEK FOR FOURTEEN YEARS and you can't even remember my NAME! My name! I left my family for christmas one year to go pick up that elmo doll for you when you were a kid! I saved you from that burning treehouse! I helped you with you're 3rd grade science fair project and you won! YOU WON! We took a picture together that i have kept in my wallet. And i proudly say here's me and timmy. ME AND TIMMY! TIMMY! But no...you don't need to know my name. Well good day sir. You shan't see me again.

What did the black guy, the latino guy, and the asian guy all have in common? They were all human beings

What do you call a black guy, a white guy, a mexican guy, and a chinese guy jumping out of a plane? Skydivers.

Q: What's the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? A: I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

How do you keep children off your front lawn? Molest them.

two guys walk into a bar. the third guy ducks

Nock Nock It's open.

A dog goes to his food bowl. He eats his dinner.

Diseases show if a prerson lacks vitamins and minerals.

Why was the little boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his face. Why was the little girl sad? Because it was her frog.

What do you call 12 black doctors in a dark room? 12 black doctors in a dark room.

A man who can't spell walks into an Arab.

"I see London; I see France..." "Wow. You must have exceptional eyesight."

What do you call a person at your door? Whatever his name happens to be.

You mamma so fat, she should consider going on a diet.

How do you drown a black man? You refuse to help him due to your pride and therefore you are no longer a decent member of society.

How do you kill a blonde? By inactivating major functions in the body, for example cutting off the blood supply to the brain.

Roses are red Violets are blue your mum went to the loo and out came you

muffled-thud muffled thud who's there? Jeremy Beadle.

why did the baby start crying? someone threw a brick at it

What's the difference between a dead baby and a ferrari? One is a sports car and the other is a baby that is not alive.

What's the difference between jelly and jam? Jelly is made from the juice of the fruit while jam is made from the pulp of the fruit.

A kraut walks out of a synagogue with no one dead

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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