What did the Dog say to the Cat? Nothing, Cats and Dogs are of different species and can therefore not understand one another.

What is the difference between a mustache, and a pile of dead babies? Mustaches disgust me.

I like my women like I like my coffee. Without a penis

What's the difference between a Jew and a Boy Scout? Boy Scouts come home from camp.

Knock Knock ... guess nobody's home.

Your social life

WNBA

why are black people good at jumping and white people aren't? That's stereotyping people .... anyone can be good jumping as long as the practice.

What did the pet lion say to its owner? Nothing. The lion then proceeded to hunt down its owner, pin him down and rip out his insides. Besides, the likelyhood of owning a lion as a pet is very slim, and even if one did, this act would be highly illegal in most parts of the world.

What's after 9/11? 9/12

A grandmother in her late seventies is walking to the grocery store. Then out of nowhere,she stats getting pelted by bananas. One hits her hard on the head,and she dies.

a potato flew around my room

Why do seagulls fly over seas? Because if they flew over bays they'd be called bagels.

What would you do for a klondike bar? I'm allergic to milk.

What do you call someone with no legs nor arms? Mat

Why was O.J acquitted for murder? A jury of his peers deliberated for many days and found there was not sufficient evidence for his conviction.

Alcatraz is reopened only for Kevin's ma

An asian without a future.

Why couldn't little Jessica open the door? It was locked

Welcome To Facebook

Kenneth kaniff takes his hat off then he meets cosmic panda with kevin the zebra because chuck norris ate a chili pepper.

knock knock whos there a boy a boy who ? oh, sorry he just got hit by a train.

Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

A kid walks into a bar. The bartender promptly calls child protective services and the child is placed in a caring foster home.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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