Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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Why did the blonde put lysol in the soup? to kill her husband

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Why did the chicken cross the road?

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What's black and blue and red all over? The dead woman in the dumpster.

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No, luke. I am your father. damnit

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Yo momma is so fat that we are incredibly concerned for her health.

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A blonde walks into a bar and orders a drink. The end.

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I got it Nero, lets just be friends for now and forget about the work I do here and you there.

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What do you call a black man that sells drugs? A pharmacist.

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united we sit, cause we're fat

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What do you call something that isn't funny? Serious

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Want to hear a joke? Jokes are not allowed on this site. Only anti-jokes.

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how many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? well it depends on the size of the bathtub - and the size of the babies, for sure.

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Yes, finally caught that mouse!

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Q: Why did Sally fall off the swing? A: She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs floating on the water? Dead.

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A guy in a truck delivering furniture runs over a frog. Concerned for the frog, he pulls over and runs back to the frog and asks "Are you ok?" The frog replies "Yeah, you want to buy a cupboard?"

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What do you call a mix between a mexican and a octopus? Actually, at this moment in time it is physically and morrally impossible to do such a thing. Scientists have yet to find a way to split the genes and create a cross species. lol jk its called a moctapus.

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What do you call a Mexican on a boat? A sailor

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What rhymes with popscicle and weighs at least 300 pounds? Your mom. I lied about the popsicle.

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Two blondes are out for a walk when they come across some tracks, they realise they are train tracks and move out of the way to make sure they aren't hit by a train.

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what do you call a mixbreed of a bull dog and a shitzu? a sharpei

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Why were little Suzie's parents crying? Suzie was kidnapped by Al Qeada

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What do you call an Arab flying a plane? A pilot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops