What's really weird? It's you Greg!

Does this napkin chloroform?

Q. What does McDonald's and Michael Jackson have in common? A. They both stick their meat in 13 year old buns.

Why did the man name his son David? He didn't. It was his wife's choice.

Ring Around The rosy, Pockets full of posey, Just kidding they are roofies and i'm going to rape you

An Irish man walked into a bar. He turned to the bartender and said hello. Then walked to the back booth for his lunch meeting with the heads of his highly profitable company and then went home.

A marine biologist is captured by a group of violent pirates. After hours of being tortured, the pirates make him walk the plank. As he is pushed on to the plank, they ask him for his one last request. He responds "Kill yourselves." The pirates proceed to stab themselves until they bleed out and the marine biologist is the last man on the boat.

The mailman saw little Johnny sitting on the side of the street with an old coffee can Mailman: What do you have in that can there? Johnny: dog shit Mailman: what the fuck

What sauce do chicken's hate? Bone suckin' sauce

what happened to the farm animals? They were slaughtered and their parts were sold as meat, glue and other useful materials

Pull over dat ass to fat, no seriously your blocking a firelane

How many Jews can you fit in a Volkswagen Bug? Four, maybe 3, depending on the size of each person.

This is not mean't to be a joke, but I have noticed the least popular thing on here is the Jew and the Pizza joke. I am Jewish and find this extremely offensive. I applaud all of those who gave it a negative vote and realize the Holocaust is not a laughing matter.

what did the fat guy say to the girl ill make fun of you because i have bigger tits than you

Q. what did the kid say to his foreign language teacher about the test? A: i dont understand this test, its like in a complete different language

What do you get if you cross a lin and a deer? A pile of bloody bones.

What do you call someone who kills their own children? Casey Anthony

What's the most racist thing ever... Manhattan

It's weird how two of the SAME jokes can get different ratings.

What did the tuna say to the fan I LIKE YOUR STOOL AHAHHAHAHHAHAH

Michael Hoffman leaves the gym

bergin y u so tubbbbbyyyy?????

Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? People cross roads all the time, each for their own personal reasons. Questioning their motives is generally accepted as being unnecessary, as it is a relatively safe action as log as one is careful and heeds the laws of traffic.

There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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