how do you make the president cry ?? shoot his family !!

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I get no respect at all. That's because I am a liar and a thief with no redeeming qualities.

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What do you get when you cross a Kangaroo with a sheep? A: That would be impossible for it is impossible to breed a kangaroo and a sheep due to their difference in genetic material and number of chromosomes

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How do you get a nun pregnant? Screw her.

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How can you confirm that Saturday comes after friday, and that Sunday comes after Saturday? consult Rebecca Black.

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What's black and has been free since the 1700's? What? I don't know, i was asking you.

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When do scientologists go to church? When they are done looking at porn.

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Why did Silly Billy throw a clock out the window? Because he was stupid.

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What is the difference between a duck. One of its legs are both the same.

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Whats red and smells like cherries? Cherries

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what does brb mean? ...be right back? ...ok hurry i need to know the answer.

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Knock, Knock Who's there? A robber who will most likely kill you along with anyone else who will ruin their chances of becoming more wealthy off your most prized possessions.

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How many cows does it take to put in a lightbulb? Well, you see, it depends how many cows it takes to put in a lightbulb.

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Why the mentally challenged man enter the bar? He's tired of being subject hate and criticism. He hates being the subject of jokes and being pointed at. He may not be able to tell you what 3x6 is, but he still has feelings. So because of all these inconsiderate people judging him, he now spends his days at the local bar, drowning his sorrows away in alcohol. I hope your happy.

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you just contradicted yourself.

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what did the homeless guy get for christmas nothing!

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A gorilla walks into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender stands speechless due to the ridiculousness of the situation -Tag

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

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Q: Why was 2 afraid of 3? A: Cause 3 4 5!

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What's the only thing better than winning a gold medal at the Special Olympics? Not being retarded.

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Q: How do you make a plumber cry? A: Kill his family.

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What did the robber take from the store? The managers dick

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What did the japanese man say to the other Japanese man? I like your eyes.

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SCUBA is spelt S C U B A

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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