-if you're American in the kitchen, British in the living room, what are you in the bathroom? -in the bathroom.

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If your South American in the kitchen, what are you in the bathroom? European ( your a pee an)

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What happens when you stab yourself in the heart? You die.

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Why do undertakers wear ties? Because their profession is very serious, and it is important that their appearance has a degree of gravitas

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Why did the baby fall off of the swing? Because he had no arms.

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What did the cat say to the dog? Nofin Eejit.

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That awkward when you adimaticlly read "moment in your head because you have seen too many of these awkward moment jokes.

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You know what they say about women with really big feet? They actually don't say anything.

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Why are chaos theorists so predictable? Because their arguments usually follow a logical set of points.

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The cow went moo

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How do u bring a dead person to life? U dont.

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how do you kill a blonde? the way you would kill anyone, here are some examples gun knife noose or orange. wait wtf who kills someone with an orange

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Why did the kid kid have no arms? A clown came and chopped them off.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A; On the other side was another beautiful looking chicken who he plans to marry and raise a family with.

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What happened in your mom's locked bedroom last night I don't know

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When life gives you lemon squeeze it in someone's face

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liam buchan is gay !

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whats a dick a dick

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what do mexicans enjoy eating? food.

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A man enters a bar. Two minutes later, a woman leaves a bar. What happened? A man entered a bar and a woman left. What's there to explain?

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Whats the difference between a pontiac and a pile of dead babies? I dont have a pontiac in my garage.

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What's funnier than a dead triceratops? Nothing, nothing at all...in fact this is scary because the triceratops and their other Cretaceous herbivores, have been extinct for over 3.5 trillion years... ........also if you see a dead triceratops, you're probably tripping on LSD.........

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Ed has spent all his days on the farm. It was the farm of his father and grandfather before him; long have they prospered from the fruits of this land. He has a wife and 3 beautiful children, all of whom live happily on the farm. Ed still manages to keep an active social life, and has lots of interesting friends. His best friend is Moe. As a young man, Ed had spent a few years living in the city for his studies. Moe lives in the city, and he knows Ed from College. One day, Moe came out to the farm to have lunch with his old friend. After lunch, he and Ed took a walk around the farm. They passed by the horses, the chickens, the pigs and finally they came to the cows. Ed looked at Moe, and he saw that he was focused intently on a single cow. "What's the matter, Moe?" he asked. "That," Moe said, "is one skinny cow."

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why is 6 afraid of 7 ? because 7 is black.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops