There are two hippopotamus' in a pond cooling off from the hot day. One is named Nathaniel IV and the other Timothy. Timothy asks Nathaniel, "Nathaniel, what day is it today?" Nathaniel then replies," I believe it is Tuesday." Timothy is taken back then replies," How odd. I could've sworn it was Wednesday."

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What did the man do when his truck was stolen? He contacted the police, who immediately began searching for the culprit. He then contacted his car insurance company and was soon compensated for the full value of his truck. One day the man was in his new truck listening to the local news and heard that the thief was found and convicted of Grand Theft Auto; his name was Martin Kaiser.

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how many babies does it take to paint a house? that is child labor, which is illegal in many countries.

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A germaphobe is in a room full of sick people. He leaves.

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liam buchan is gay !

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O: How do you kill a black man? A: Shoot him

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maths is annoying!!! LIKE if you agree!!!!! :D

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Why did the elephant cross the road? It was the chickens day off. haha its funny

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Why did the blond put a condom on her hear? So, she would not get hearing ads.

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A man was driving five penguins across the Croatian-Serbian border. He was a penguin smuggler.

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What do you call a man with no arms? A cripple.

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There once was a squirrel. He lost his nuts.

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Two Guys walk into a bar; the second one should have seen it coming.

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Why are black people so good at sports? They practice.

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what do you do to get a guy to vomit?? kick him in the balls!

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why did the chicken cross the road because the farm is across the street from were it is now

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1: Knock. Knock. 2: Don't come in I'm naked.

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Why is an elephant large, grey and wrinkled? Because if it was small, round and smooth it would be an aspirin.

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wanna here an anti joke scroll down

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jack shine and keiran = nate robinson

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- What's the difference between a gay man and a refrigerator? - The refrigerator doesn't fart when you take your meat out.

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What's black and white and red all over? Two nuns in a chainsaw fight.

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What has legs but can't walk? A paralyzed man.

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Why was the baby crying? Because you repeatly hit it in the face with a brick, you sick freak.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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