Q.What did the anti-joke reader say to the doctor? A-My finger is stuck on the dislike button.

Q: What is worse than The Apocalypse? A: Darkseid, Thanathos, Red Hulk, Onslaught, come on The Apocalypse cant even beat the X-men! Moral: "I AM THE APOCALYPSE, YOU ARE NOT FIT TO SURVIVE!"

Why did the boy scream? Because his girlfriend poked him in the butthole, which he was not expecting. Thus surprising him.

What's worse than finding a small cockroach in your drink? Finding a medium sized cockroach in your drink. What's worse than finding a medium sized cockroach in your drink? Genocide. What's worse than genocide? Finding a large sized cockroach in your drink.

What did the hammer say to the drill? Nothing, they don't talk stupid.

Roses are red violets are blue I would test our new water bed so be carefull with your helled shoe!

How did they wake up Lady Gaga? They p-p-poked her face p-p-poked her face......!

A man walks into a bar and the bartender says, "What's up?" The man replies, "The opposite of down."

What's the difference between erotica and kink? Erotica involves simple arousal; kink usually has an added element of masochism.

Why did the chicken cross the road? to get to your house KNOCK KNOCK who's there? da chicken

Justin bieber is a loser! One Direction all the way baby!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!<3

How long does it take a Jewish man to pleasure his wife? There are many factors that go in to pleasuring a woman, none of which are readily measureable

What is purple and flies? A purple plane.

What's black and blue and red all over? The dead woman in the dumpster.

so a dyslexic man sold his soul to Santa

That's a rhetorical question chickens don't cross roads!

what do you call a black man being hung from a tree? -prejudice

Q: If Hitler spots a jew, what will he do? A: You suck at history dude, Hitler is dead! Moral: What? You did not get the daily news?

Why did the homeless man get skin cancer Because he didn't have a home so the Suns rays had been directed towards him For 3 years and he was to poor to purchase Sun screen

So a leg, an arm and a head win the Boston marathon. And I'm sitting here masturbating, ...

A dyslexic man walks into a bra. He then proceeds to ask his wife not to leave her clothing around the house.

Why did the plane crash? -Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

Why did Coolio appear in the joke below? He did not, he was not for real at this particular situation... Well It was actually a typo because some douchebag told me Coolio sang that song and I forgot to change the name after finding the truth... Moral: YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH!

An Englishmen, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar, and ordered a beer. They later went home and slept. They woke up the next morning with a slight hangover.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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