My new Muslim friend is the BOMB

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The daring man said "here goes nothing." And nothing happened. -Tag

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What did the colonel say to the soldier before he got into the army tank? Get in.

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If i could rearrange the alphabet, i'd put my penis in your mouth

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whats worse than 9/11? 9/12

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Baby you think i loved you, but you got played too

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Why do jewish women like to get their sons circumcised? They like anything 25% off.

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What did the children in India eat for dinner?

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What has 9 arms and sucks? Def Leppard

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What do you call 12 black doctors in a dark room? 12 black doctors in a dark room.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread

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A women president

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A Jew walks into a bar. He quickly works on treating the injuries he had received from hitting his head against the bar when he had walked into it.

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What did the black guy, the latino guy, and the asian guy all have in common? They were all human beings

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Why'd humpty dumpy fall of the wall? Someone threw a fridge at him

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Why did the mentally handicapped kid fail his math test? Because he didn't study.

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Two scientists are experimenting with sulfuric acid. One scientist says to the other, "Did you see the new intern?" In the process of turning to face the first scientist, the second scientist knocks the beaker over and spills sulfuric acid all over the first scientist's hand. The first scientist writhes in pain as the second scientist rushes to find a strong base to neutralize the burn. After a few minutes, the first scientist is rushed off to the emergency room and suffers from some serious chemical burns.

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Q: Why was the duck hands down hilarious? A: It wasn't, ducks don't have hands and with human beings able to be equipped with emotions such as to see an object or living organism as funny, do not view these mammals in a humorous manner.

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A horse walks into a bar. The barman says why the long face. The horse, unable to understand English shits on the floor and leaves

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Why did I have sex with your mom? Because she was a beautiful individual with a fine taste in the classical arts. She also offered me a ride to her place for a delicious 3 course meal. Afterwards our romance blossomed and we decided to have sexual intercourse to show our mutual appreciation for each other.

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Your momma is so old, she has lived a wonderful, long life and witness a lot of human achievement.

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one swipe, i call this one the cinderella story if you HAH! know what i mean, Paul....are you ok?....nooo...., you know the lettuce in antarctica is pretty questionable

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(insert command here) Oh yeah, well I want world peace.

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what is long and bare? polonaise to the pediatric ward what is short and bald? same polonaise, 3 weeks later

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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