Why did the man eat his hat? Autism.

What do you call a gay black man driving off a cliff? A fine example of the dangers of drink driving.

A man walks into a bar. He buys a drink, drinks his drink, and leaves.

How do you kill a blonde? you shoot her.

Women.

Why cant penguins fly? because they cant

A man walks into a doctors office. The doctor says "I've got good news and bad news. Which do you want to hear first?" The man responds "I'd like to hear the good news." The doctor says "I ran a series of tests and found you have leukemia, but your insurance covered everything." The man hangs his head and tears up as he asks "What's the bad news?" The doctor heads for the door as he answers "Your company is switching to a private insurer and because of your pre-existing condition you're being denied coverage. None of your future treatments or appointments will be paid for." The man snaps his fingers and says "I should've voted Democrat!"

What is the square root of 69? 8.30662386

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There once was a man from Peru, Who dreamed he was eating his shoe. He woke with a fright in the middle of the night, To find nothing amiss.

Roses are Grey Violets are Grey lolololol Im a dog

Why did the potato commit suicide? Forget that. Why was the potato alive in the first place?

Their, they're, there You're, your

why do birds fly away when you go near them? incase your black

How could problems have been avoided in the old west? Bigger towns

what do you call a cow with no legs? ground beef

What is the difference between a rock and a pencil? Your Mom.

What happened to all of the happy birds flying over the field? They were all suddenly stricken by the bird flu and died.

Chinese, Japanese, dirty knees - have nothing at all in common.

What's the best way to look 10 pounds thinner? Lose 10 pounds

What do you call a dead baby lying in the road? A Tragedy

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting cancer from a horse.

i hate it when Voldemort showers in my nutella

What's worse than nailing 10 babies to a tree? Nailing1 baby to 10 trees

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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