A Mexican walks up to a fence in Texas and watches as the police take away his next door neighbor for tax evasion.

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Four rats are smoking in an alley. One rat turns to another and comments, "These are some fine smokes. Where'd ya score these?" The rat holding the pack of Menthols replies, "Off a' Fred." He points to a rotting whale carcass in the road. The other rats are horrified. "How did a whale die in the street?!," they squeak. "He didn't. He died on the beach."

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What do you say to Michael and Justin? The Game

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A man walks outside and walks back in. Why? Because it was raining purple unicorns and he felt the need to go back inside.

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A Chinese man, an American man, and a Mexican man are sitting in an airplane. When the flight attendant comes by with food, the Chinese and American both opt for pretzels, while the Mexican prefers crackers and makes his selection accordingly. The three sit back and enjoy their snacks separately.

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Why did the chicken cross the road Because you didn't fuking cook to -.-

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.....Carrot Top....

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Roses are blue violets are red I think I'm getting drunk get me to my van

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What white and black and red all over? The wife who refused to report that her husband abused her.

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Why Did the Drug dealer die He Got Hit by a buss

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What's the difference between a large pizza and a Mexican? A large pizza can feed a family.

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When life gives you lemons, You find a new life

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Whats worse than finding out that your family is dead? finding a worm in your apple

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what do you call a 2-foot blue scottishman named max? max

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It is the conjoining of the two possible outcomes of the interstellar and post modern possibilities of the pasta sex god's niece's favorite colour after she falls off her bike whilst riding down a yellow slide after her twenty-seventh birthday when the two suns form a triangle in the night sky over the delta. Yes indeed that was good pudding.

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Why did the boy want to commit suicide? Because he didn't want to die.

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Womans profesional lacrosse

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press Ctrl and F4 on ur key pad

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Why can't Abraham Lincoln lie? Because he is dead.

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Call me a banana. You're a banana. No I'm not

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Mum: Never put off for tomorrow what can be done today. Child: Oh, I was going to play video games tomorrow, so...

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What did the woman say when the man got her flowers? "Why thank you."

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A guy walks into a bar, and then is hit with the full force of all the things he never did in life, of how he wasted his younger years chasing a bigger paycheck rather than trying to live life, and all the love he wasted on people who didn't care about him. He begins to cry as his first drink arrives, and orders many more as the night passes. He loses his keys as he leaves and stumbles home in a drunken stupor, contemplating suicide.

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Which came first the chicken or the egg? The egg because if a chicken came first then that means chickens magically appeared. Eggs however may change over time through evolution by a common ancestor because after millions of years of hatching, it slowly mutated by natural selection and became to what is now known as the domestic chicken. (Applause)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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