How do you stop a baby from falling into a manhole? You catch it, and then call the appropriate services and inform them of the dangerous open manhole.

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Why did the elephant cross the road? The chicken was on vacation.

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what do you get when you cross a man and a horse? Collision

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What is the difference between your mom and a cow? One is a 1,500 pound beast, and one is a human being.

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Bill:Ask me to do something. Bob:Go get me a beer Bill:Would you like fries with that?

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this website is the funniest thing i've ever seen, besides everything i've seen that's funnier than it

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What is Kanye West's main goal in life? To crush the hopes and dreams of singing stars on national television, beginning with Taylor Swift.

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What's brown and sticky? ...A stick.

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A man walked into a bar There were some other people there too

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What did the little boy with cancer get for Christmas? Shot.

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if a fat man in a red suit puts you in a bag at night. its not santa your getting raped

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Why shouldn't you ask Lebron James for change for a dollar? Because in the year 2013 Lebron will tear his ACL and will never able to play the game again. He then won't be able to land a job because he never finished college. After being unable to land a job, he then develops an expensive crack addiction. His house gets foreclosed, and he becomes broke. And is then a homeless broke man who does not even have 4 quarters to his name.

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what do you get when you cross do you get when you cross a banana and a monkey? one happy monkey

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Q: How can you fit 1000 jews in one car? A: The Ashtray

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What do you get when you put the head of a lion on the body of an eagle?2 dead animals and a fine for killing protected species.

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One day I was hungry. I ate. I wasn't hungry anymore. Penis.

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What did the dying boy get for Christmas? Presents

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why the woman scream when she arrived at her surprise party? Everyone was dead!

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who hooks up with grade 7's? •Jake Muchnik

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Snarf Nuggets

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John: Hey Bill, ORANGE you in the mood to go to a Phillies game? Bill: Yes! So let's make like a banana and raise our potassium levels drastically and leave right away to beat the rush hour traffic.

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Womens rights.

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What do you get when you cross a donkey and a horse? a mule

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why shouldn't hellen keller drive? because she's a woman

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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