There are two types of people in the world: humans

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A blonde, redhead, and a brunette are chatting outside a casino. The brunette directs a joke towards the blonde. "What's the difference between cotton candy and pork chops?" The blonde has heard the joke prior to this encounter and correctly completes it with sign language because she is deaf.

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A black teenager drives an Escalade His father is a prominent lawyer and his mother is a neuroscientist.

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Please Rape William Wright

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The frightened girl did everything the man said. " Open your legs. Bend over..." She was playing Simon says and was afraid to loose. It wasn't rape, which her sister had experienced while traveling in 2007.

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What do you get when you cross a donkey and a hemophiliac? A bleeding ass!

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Why does jim never go to McDonalds? his wife got shot there.

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Knock Knock! .... Knock Knock! ... There seems to be nobody at home...

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Why is Pawn Stars the best show on the History Channel? Because Pawn Stars is the only show on the History Channel.

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How does one peel a potato? First I would suggest going to your local grocery store, and purchasing a vegetable peeler (although, in fact, the potato is not considered a vegetable). Once at home, I recommend disinfecting it of germs. Unless you already own a vegetable peeler, in which case I would simply peel the potato as every normal human would.

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Womens Rights.

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Why is the sky blue? The sun reflects off the water molecules in all bodies of water

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Two cowboys are in a kitchen. The first one says, "I feel at Home on the range!" To which the second replies, "Is that because of your extensive culinary background?" The first cowboy breaks down in tears because he has never pursued his real dream.

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You might be a Redneck...if your job requires you to work long hours out in the sun and you do not take advantage of sunscreen.

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When life hands you lemons, you should question your sanity

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What does DNA stand for? The National Dyslexic Association

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"Hey guys lets have a standing obviation." No one else stands....

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? Well, if the socket were 20 feet in the air, it might take 4 blondes with really good balance. Then again, it might not matter how many blondes there are due to transportation issues. (What if there are no replacement light bulbs in the house, and the nearest store was 10 miles away? It would be ridiculous to expect someone to walk twenty miles to replace a light bulb) In conclusion, I would say that the number of blondes it takes to screw in a light bulb is dependent on the individual situation at hand.

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A Muslim walks into a bar. BOOM

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Try saying "Good Eye Might" without sounding Australian.

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What do you call an Arab flying a plane? A pilot.

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What do a duck and a bicycle have in common? They both have handlebars, except for the duck.

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this sentence will not monkey banana pie

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Why was the little boy so bad at the piano? It was his first time playing it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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